My mother died when I was five, and I am now fourteen. I still find it hard to deal with, but don’t want to tell my family about it. Do you have any tips?

Answer

Your mom would be with you if she could, my young friend. I'm sorry about the loss of your mother.

Please don't continue to push this important issue down and not speak about "the elephant in the room." Instead, find a way to talk about your grief with your family because it's likely that you have questions about your mother's life and/or her passing. Or, you may want to share memories or see photos, or talk about how her absence makes an impact on your life emotionally and practically.

Here's how you might start the conversation:

1) Approach your father, guardian, or a grandparent who is a good listener. It's best if you have some privacy so you can be open.

2) Select a relaxed time when things are going well, and you're chatting about other issues. It's better NOT to mix it with arguments or when there's time pressure, and there isn't time to have the conversation. You need a relaxed, unrushed conversation, if possible.

3) Say something along the lines of, "Can I talk to you about something? I still miss Mom, and I find it hard to deal with sometimes."

Don't overthink this. You won't get it perfect so just do it. It may be a good thing ahead of time if you think about what you want out of the conversation. That will help you communicate your needs. Listen to your relative's grief, too. You have something in common.

Ideally, this should be an ongoing conversation. It is possible to include the memory of a lost loved one in your life and talk about them in daily life in a healthy way. Some people find that a psychologist or family counselor is helpful in processing grief, especially if it is creating difficulties in their lives.

I wish you the best in addressing this with your family and with everything in your life. Please check back with us and update us at a later time to let us know how you're doing. You can leave a comment in the Comments Section of the playlist of Songs About Sorrow, Grief, and Lost Loved Ones.

Updated on January 6, 2019

Original Article:

152 Songs About Sorrow, Grief, and Lost Loved Ones
By FlourishAnyway
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