Updated date:

57 Songs About Regrets, Apologies, and Feeling Sorry

FlourishAnyway believes there is a playlist for just about any situation and is on a mission to unite and entertain the world through song.

Here is an apology and regret playlist for those who have been wronged and those who need to step up and make amends.  "Sorry" is such a hard word to say.

Here is an apology and regret playlist for those who have been wronged and those who need to step up and make amends. "Sorry" is such a hard word to say.

Does Sorry Always Make It Better?

If you think infidelity happens among only young lovers, think again. It occurs among 85 year-old couples, too.

An elderly relative — a kind, decent career Army veteran who cherished animals, children, and fishing — died recently after a protracted illness. He lasted only a few days in hospice, withering sadly in his bedroom sanctuary as a result of pneumonia complications. Extended family gathered to say tearful farewells.

You would have expected his wife of 57 years to have been by his side in his final moments. Instead, she was engrossed in conversation with her male "friend." The two have shared an on-and-off romantic history longer than her marriage.

For years, the male friend has been a frequent visitor at family gatherings, her ailing husband's birthday party and even the hospital where she and her husband shared rooms across the hall from one another. A recent widower himself, her friend calls every night at the same time. Unfortunately, the husband died during their nightly call. There would be no last minute apologies.

Apologize before the chance slips away.

Apologize before the chance slips away.

Apologies Are a Place to Start

We've all caused others to suffer—both intentionally and by accident—and been hurt by them, too. Sometimes the damage is deep and irreparable. Does sorry always make it better? Sadly, no. Regret is like a boomerang. You never know when it will come back and strike you. Some misdeeds are more challenging to make right than others.

Apologies, however, are at least a place to start for those strong enough to face the consequences of their own hurtful actions. Say what you need to before the opportunity for "sorry" slips away forever.

1. "Hello" by Adele

In this 2015 song, an old lover attempts to reconnect after years apart so that she can apologize for long ago transgressions. Unfortunately, her former sweetheart won't pick up the phone. Instead, she must pour out her heart into his voice mail.

2. "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" by Chicago

The guy in this classic 1982 Chicago song has royally screwed up. Now he's trying to grovel his way back into his lover's heart. She's given him the old heave-ho, so it won't be easy. Romeo promises that

After all that we've been through
I will make it up to you, I promise to
And after all that's been said and done
You're just the part of me I can't let go.

3. "Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word" by Elton John

When you've hurt the one that you've loved the first step to bridging the divide is saying, "I'm sorry." But sometimes it's easier said than done.

This 1976 song describes the lonely, desperate feeling of trying to make amends. Come on. Just man up and say the freakin' words.

"Right actions in the future are the best apologies for bad actions in the past." -  Tryon Edwards, American theologian

"Right actions in the future are the best apologies for bad actions in the past." - Tryon Edwards, American theologian

4. "Sorry" by Justin Bieber

One more shot at forgiveness. That's all Justin Bieber needs to reedem himself in his lover's heart, according to this 2015 song. Although both parties are at fault, he agrees to take all the blame. (So then why is he bringing that part up?)

He says he's missing more than Selena's—I mean his lover's—body. Dude, move on. It's getting unhealthy.

"Never apologize. Never explain. Just get the thing done, and let them howl." - Agnes Macphail, Canadian politician

"Never apologize. Never explain. Just get the thing done, and let them howl." - Agnes Macphail, Canadian politician

5. "Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams

I don't know what Bryan Adams did, but his 2010 apology song is so earnest that even I want to forgive him. He wants to make it all better, reminding his lover how they fit like two perfect pieces of a puzzle. He wants to let his lover know how much he needs them, which is the heart of any sincere apology:

Please forgive me if I need you like I do.
Please believe me.
Every word I say is true...
Please forgive me
I can't stop loving you.

6. "Baby Come Back" by Player

This 1977 hit oozes the desperation of being left by someone you love. You're a mess without them around. You try to forget them. You're ready to take all the blame if they'll just come back, please come back into your life. (Not healthy, but that's another story.)

Baby come back, any kind of fool could see
There was something in everything about you
Baby come back, you can blame it all on me
I was wrong and I just can't live without you.

7. "Too Late to Apologize" by Timbaland featuring One Republic

Sometimes you reach a point when enough is enough. Your lover plays too many games, hurts you too many times and it's too late to apologize. You're done. This 2007 song shows backbone in the face of being jerked around by a sweetheart.

"Being sorry is the highest act of selfishness, seeing value only after discarding it." - Douglas Horton

"Being sorry is the highest act of selfishness, seeing value only after discarding it." - Douglas Horton

8. "Don't Love You No More (I'm Sorry)" by Craig David

Sometimes apologies describe the brutal truth we need to hear. In this 2005 song about a relationship that has run its course, a man offers this sad but bitter truth to his lady friend:

I don't care babe who's right or wrong
I just don't love you no more.

"Love in the real world means saying you're sorry 10 times a day" - Kathie Lee Gifford, American tv personality and singer

"Love in the real world means saying you're sorry 10 times a day" - Kathie Lee Gifford, American tv personality and singer

9. "I Still Believe in You" by Vince Gill

It's unfortunate how sometimes those who are closest to us you often get the least of our time and energy. In this 1992 song, Vince Gill sings that he's sorry it took him so long to realize the situation, and he wants the chance to make it right.

9. "Forgive Me" by Evanescence

This 1999 ballad describes a couple in which one partner is on a losing streak, uttering mean words she really doesn't mean. As soon as she blurts them out, she wants to snatch them right back, but the damage is done. It makes the other partner feel sad and broken and the speaker begs forgiveness.

11. "Sorry" by Ciara

Blowups and misunderstandings need to be corrected immediately before they lead to major repercussions. This 2012 song by Ciara emphasizes the urgency of working it out.

12. "I'm Sorry" by Blake Shelton (featuring Martina McBride)

Sometimes by the time you apologize too much damage has been done. That's the message that Blake Shelton imparts in this 2011 song. I wonder if he ever sang this to Miranda during their troubles?

Oh, you're sorry,
So sorry,
And you want it back the way it was.
Well I'm sorry,
But sometimes sorry,
Just ain't good enough.

"It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them." -  P. G. Wodehouse, English humorist

"It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them." - P. G. Wodehouse, English humorist

13. "Sorry For the Stupid Things" by Babyface

This 2005 song by Babyface is a cold dose of reality. The protagonist admits to his sweetheart that sometimes we do stupid things, and when that's the case please just overlook it in the spirit of "no harm intended."

Sometimes a man
Is gonna be a man
It's not an excuse
It's just how it is
Sometimes the wrong
Don't know that they're wrong
Sometimes the strong
Ain't always so strong.

14. "So Sorry" by Feist

This 2007 Indie song asserts that instead of fighting and crying, maybe it's better to say "I'm sorry" and just hold one another tight.

"Apologizing does not always mean you're wrong and the other person is right. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego." - Mark Mathews, Australian surfer

"Apologizing does not always mean you're wrong and the other person is right. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego." - Mark Mathews, Australian surfer

15. "All Apologies" by Nirvana

In a sense this 1993 Grammy award-winning song was prophetic. Kurt Cobain mused about apologies and absorbing all the blame. In 1994, the famous singer who shaped the the music of the 1990s and beyond committed suicide.

16. "Sorry" by Madonna

Don't even try to tell Madonna "sorry" because she's downright bitter about all this apology crap. In this 2005 song, she says she's heard it all before, so save your precious breath.

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say "Forgive me"
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore.

"Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so." - Ray Stannard Baker, American journalist

"Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so." - Ray Stannard Baker, American journalist

17. "Butterfly" by Weezer

With references to Madame Butterfly, this 1996 song is about taking advantage of innocence and someone who loves you and apologizing for promises that you've made that won't be kept. Some things were never meant to be.

18. "Back to December" by Taylor Swift

Usually Taylor Swift's songs are about how she's been wronged, but this one from 2010 is different. (Some say it's about her ill-fated relationship with Taylor Lautner.)

The song is an apology for mistreating a former lover and causing a dramatic conflict that ended the relationship in a hurtful way: "You gave me roses and I left them there to die." Since then, the protagonist has replayed the love affair and regrets her behavior, wishes she could press rewind. She goes back to December all the time, and this is her apology.

19. "Why" by Jason Aldean

The man in this 2008 song by Jason Aldean is really beating himself up for his relationship mistakes. He's waited until 3 a.m. to apologize, but only after his lady threatens to leave.

Why do I always use the words that cut the deepest
When I know how much it hurts you?
Oh baby why do I do that to you?

How To Apologize

Hey, put on your big boy britches (or big girl panties) and just do it. You got this!

Step

1) Express remorse: Say that you are "sorry" or that you "apologize".

2) Accept responsibility: Put yourself in the other person's shoes and acknowledge that your behavior caused harm and/or hurt feelings to the other person.

3) Make amends: Offer to make the situation right. Be specific.

4) Promise it won't happen again. This rebuilds trust between you.

20. "I Apologize" by Anita Baker

The woman in this 1994 song had a fight with her lover and made hurtful remarks. They had a shouting match, and she was very unkind. Now it's eating her up, and she's phoning him to make amends.

songs-about-being-sorry-the-apology-and-regret-playlist

21. "I'm Sorry" by Brenda Lee

In this 1960 hit, Brenda Lee asks for forgiveness for whatever she did. She claims that youth and blind love caused her make blind mistakes.

22. "Always on My Mind" by Willie Nelson

No one is the perfect mate—attentive, kind, or expressive enough. However, this 1982 classic by Willie Nelson says that it's the intent that counts. He reminds his beloved: "You were always on my mind."

23. "Let's Be Us Again" by Lonestar

In this 2004 country hit, a man apologizes to his darling after losing his temper and saying a lot of mean-spirited things. He's reaching out for her, begging for forgiveness, wanting for the relationship to return to what it was.

22. "If I Could Turn Back Time" by Cher

Cher is feeling mighty regretful in this 1989 classic in which the protagonist wishes she could just press "reset" and take back all the mean words and things that she did to hurt her lover. Her actions drove her lover away because she was too proud to say "sorry."

She confesses:

I don't know why I did the things I did
I don't know why I said the things I said
Love's like a knife it can cut deep inside
Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes.

23. "Don't Think I Don't Think About It" by Darius Rucker

In this 2008 song, the protagonist left his sweetheart standing in his rearview mirror, swearing never to return. She faded from his life, married and moved on.

But he has regrets. She's the "what if" girl, the one he's always wondered about. But she's someone's else's wife. That's regret, buddy. Sorry.

24. "The Greatest Man I Never Knew" by Reba McEntire

This 1991 song is a regretful ballad about never truly connecting with a loved one who lives in the same house. A girl grows up with a stoic father who never takes the time to tell her how much he loves her. He's always got his attention diverted elsewhere, and the daughter separates herself in her room.

Little does she know that she means everything to him. Now that he has been dead for a year, the opportunity to build a true, meaningful relationship has passed along with him. Don't let this happen to you. Say what you need to say now.

25. "Help Me Hold On" by Travis Tritt

This 1990 song expresses the remorse and desperation of a lover at the moment he knows he's being moved out on. She's packing her suitcase, and he can no longer ignore the warning signs that their relationship is in trouble. He admits he took her love for granted and now the regretful fella will do anything to make it right again. Too late?

26. "Cat's In the Cradle" by Harry Chapin

This folk rock song from 1974 has stood the test of time because it conveys a powerful message: relationships are investments, built in small moments, over lifetimes, and you get out of them what you put into them.

The father in this song never had time for his son growing up. When he finally did, his son had a family of his own and was too busy for him. Worst of all, he had taught his son to be just like him.

Even More Songs About Sorrow and Regret

Have a suggested regret or apology song? Feel free to recommend it in the Comments Section below. You don't have to be a HubPages member to leave a comment.

SongArtistYear Released

27. I'm Sorry

All 4 One

1995

28. So Sorry

Brian McKnight

2003

29. I'm Sorry To Myself

Alanis Morrisette

2002

30. Just Say You're Sorry

Black Crowes

1993

31. Purple Rain

Prince

1984

32. Million Years Ago

Adele

2015

33. Who's Sorry Now?

Connie Francis

1957

34. So Sorry

Feist

2010

35. Sorry For Love

Celine Dion

2002

36. Cold

Crossfade

2004

37. Sorry

Buckcherry

2006

38. When I Was Your Man

Bruno Mars

2012

39. Walk on Water

Eddie Money

1998

40. South Central Rain (I'm Sorry)

R.E.M.

1984

41. The Apologist

R.E.M.

1998

42. Suedehead

Morrissey

1988

43. Jealous Guy

John Lennon

1971

44. 4:44

Jay-Z

2017

45. Two Dozen Roses

Shenandoah

1989

46. I'm All Out of Love

Air Supply

1980

47. F*ck Apologies

JoJo (featuring Wiz Khalifa)

2016

48. I Was Wrong

Social Distortion

1996

49. I Want You Back

Jackson 5

1970

50. Fall

ODESZA (featuring Sasha Sloan)

2017

51. Let You Down

NF

2017

52. On Bended Knee

Boyz II Men

1994

53. What Might Have Been

Little Texas

1993

54. All I Need Is a Miracle

Mike + The Mechanics

1986

55. Mad

Ne-Yo

2008

56. She Wouldn't Be Gone

Blake Shelton

2008

57. Be Careful What You Wish For

Luke Combs

2017

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

Questions & Answers

Question: I pushed someone I loved away because of my own insecurities and personal problems. I hurt them in the process, and now I am trying to apologize with a song. Do you have any suggestions?

Answer: Here are several suggestions based on the limited information provided:

1) "Come Back Song" by Darrius Rucker (2010)

2) "Baby Come Back" by Player (1977)

3) "Hard to Say I'm Sorry by Chicago (1982)

Whatever song you select, you might highlight key lyrics when you send it. If you apologize deeply, express how important both they and the relationship are to you, and accept responsibility for your transgression without getting defensive (i.e., just OWN it), then it is possible to patch things up.

Even if your someone special doesn't forgive you at first, ask them to continue to consider your request rather than saying "no." Also request permission to talk with them again at a later date. As long as the lines of communication are kept open, you're in decent shape.

Question: I cheated on the man I love. He is my everything, and it was the biggest mistake of my life. How can I fix it? How do we save us?

Answer: We all make mistakes, and you have violated this man's sacred trust. This rejection cuts deep, but affairs can sometimes be forgiven. Go to him and ask him to hear you out. Look him in the eye, hold his hands, and pour out your heart. Accept responsibility for violating his trust. It doesn't matter if he was working too hard, didn't give you the attention you needed, or whatever else allegedly caused you to seek the affections of another man. You are the one who violated the bond between you, so own it fully and ask for his forgiveness. It may or may not come.

Ask how you can make this right between you. Tell him it was the worst mistake you've ever made. Tell him what he means to you. Offer to go to a counselor to work on any communication issues between you and rebuild trust. Allow him to express his anger and sadness and ask questions.

If he won't talk to you in person, call him, FaceTime him or write him a heartfelt letter. Whatever his answer is, respect it. Either way, you have learned an important lesson.

Question: What does the song, "Words of December" mean?

Answer: This is a song of both joy and regret, celebrating the season of Christmas as a special time in which people

- take time for their family and friends

- wish one another well

- emphasize joy and peace on earth and

- allow their hearts to radiate love.

The narrator wonders as beautiful as this is why do we only do this at Christmas? He is sorry that it cannot always be like this, no matter the season. The song was sung by Petter Hollens (2016). The YouTube link is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtlZXmuh9M4

Question: I made multiple mistakes sleeping with someone else instead of my significant other and need a good song to apologize. Any suggestions?

Answer: I especially like "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" by Chicago (1982) because of its meaningful lyrics. It's a classic for a reason!

Especially look at the following lyrics. It wouldn't be too difficult to send your beloved a slide show of photos of the two of you during good times set to this song, then at the end include a personalized message.

Hold me now

It's hard for me to say I'm sorry

I just want you to know

Hold me now

I really want to tell you I'm sorry

I could never let you go

After all that we've been through

I will make it up to you

I promise to

And after all that's been said and done

You're just the part of me I can't let go

Question: I asked for an open relationship that I really didn't want and it just took a spiraling turn downward. We ended up breaking up it's been about a week. It's the worst mistake I've ever made. What song can I use to fix it?

Answer: I'm glad you see that three's a crowd. Send your honey a song like, "Baby Come Back" by Player (1977) with a simple message that you made the biggest mistake of your life and you want to apologize and talk it over. Follow up with roses or another heartfelt gesture to woo him/her. In your discussion, accept full responsibility and communicate that your lover is "enough" for you.

Question: I hurt my boyfriend, and have tried to apologize, but he won't listen to me. What song should I send him? He thinks he hurt me as well.

Answer: Although I'm not usually a fan of The Beatles, I do like their song, "We Can Work It Out" (1965). You can find other appropriate songs on the playlist, Songs About Meeting in the Middle and Compromise: https://spinditty.com/playlists/Songs-About-Meetin...

Question: When I treat the person that I loved badly, what do I do? I don't want to just say sorry.

Answer: There are several things you can do to help make things right.

First, instead of waiting to be called on your inappropriate behavior and being asked for an apology, it would be better if you volunteered that you behaved inappropriately and stepped up to offer a heartfelt apology.

Secondly, make sure you provide a genuine and effective apology, as outlined in the article. This includes the following steps:

1) Express remorse: Say that you are "sorry" or that you "apologize."

2) Accept responsibility: Put yourself in the other person's shoes and acknowledge that your behavior caused harm and hurt feelings to the other person.

3) Make amends: Offer to make the situation right. Be specific.

4) Promise it won't happen again. This rebuilds trust between you.

Lastly, continually work on changing your behavior so that you don't repeat the mistake. It's very honorable of you to want to do right by those you care about. Hope this advice helps you do that.

Question: I cheated on the love of my life, and now she won’t look at me or talk to me, can I do anything to fix this?

Answer: Choices have consequences, and it's possible that you've lost her for good. Whether you can repair the broken trust between you depends on many things -- for example, the formality of commitment between you two, the length of your relationship, was the cheating a one-time tryst or a longer affair, who it was with (hopefully, not her best friend!), and the emotional baggage in both your relationship and her past.

If she won't discuss the matter with you in person, or via phone or FaceTime, try writing a letter with a heartfelt apology -- yes, the old-fashioned handwritten kind. Perhaps include it in a card or have a florist deliver it along with a dozen roses. People don't write letters anymore, and it takes an investment of time and heart, so you'll get her attention. Mail it to her, if needed.

You get ONE shot at this so make it good! Don't make excuses or give any justifications or rationales. Own how wrong you were and express how you let both her and yourself down. In your own words, validate how cheating must have made her feel (second best, unwanted, rejected!). Remember that emotional cheating and physical cheating both hurt like hell. Tell her WHY she is the only one for you and why you realize that now that she isn't in your life. Paint the picture of where you want the relationship to go, any dreams you have for the two of you, and (if it's true) say that you're willing to do the hard work to rebuild her trust if she gives you another chance. Be warned that this involves answering a lot of questions about the cheating, a lot of anger and tears, and having to account for your whereabouts.

Don't expect instant forgiveness, even under the best of circumstances. Why? One of the great relationship insecurities is whether a partner will continue to be faithful when one's good looks fade, health or wealth declines, luck turns sour, or they're at their most vulnerable. She probably questions that if you cheated now why you wouldn't do it again?

You own causing her this pain. Spill your guts, then tell her the decision is all hers if she wants to take it slow and try to work it out. Then, if her answer is no, stop. That's unwanted attention. Chalk it up to a lesson learned the hard way.

Question: When someone apologizes for mistreating you, what can you say other than, "It's okay"?

Answer: Good question because it is NOT okay to treat others poorly, so why say that? Here are some other options:

1) "Thank you." You're thanking them for recognizing that they hurt you or acted poorly. You're thanking them for making a sincere apology. You are not excusing the behavior, however. This is the most empowering choice to me.

2) "I accept your apology. Let's move on" or "I forgive you," but only if that's truly the case. If not, then state the opposite and discuss why. If you still need time to process the situation, you can say that instead. Avoid saying that all is forgotten because that is hyperbole at best, a lie at worst.

3) If you doubt the sincerity of the apology, you can reiterate how their behavior impacted you. For example, a pseudo-apology may contain words such as "If I said," "If you thought/felt," or "If I did anything." Clarifying that yes, they did say/do something and that yes, you did consider it offensive gives them the chance to understand the impact of their behavior, own it, and have an apology redo right there on the spot.

Teach people how to treat you.

Question: I crossed a line with a friend. He thinks I like him romantically, but I do not. We share a bond together over the loss of our spouses. He won’t return any of my texts or messages. I desperately want to apologize to him. What do I do?

Answer: If he absolutely will not return your texts, messages, phone calls, emails, or FaceTimes, then you're going to have to write a good old-fashioned letter (or go see him personally, which would probably be perceived as a little stalky). Send your letter with a card, and begin with something to the effect of, "Can I clear the air over something that happened that I regret?" Then explain yourself and ask for forgiveness, a clean slate, or whatever else you want. Tell him you've tried to contact him via text etc. to apologize (so he doesn't think they were ongoing attempts to pursue you).

People who are grieving and lonely sometimes do inappropriate things because they miss the warm arms of their partner. People can misread romantic, friendship or other behavioral cues. People can make incorrect assumptions about what others' motives are. We all make mistakes. If he does not respond to your letter, at least you've been adult about trying to make amends and correct wrong information, thus you can move on from your friendship. I am sorry about the loss of your spouse.

Question: My husband of 23 years moved out after saying that I needed to start taking care of myself again. He is fed up with the arguing and namecalling and says he misses the person he married. He told me he would never leave, but then he did. How can I get him to give us another chance? How can I get him to believe that I am sorry for all the things I have done and said and that I love him and will do anything to make us work?

Answer: It sounds like you need a relationship reboot before it's too late, and it's going to take a lot of work so that you don't wind up in divorce court. Do some honest soul searching first about what you truly want, how you really feel about him, and why you behaved the way you did. Make sure that wanting him back is not simply a knee-jerk reaction to being rejected. Were you truly good for one another? Are you both capable of change, forgiveness, and growing together? Are there other people complicating this relationship?

After you are clear about your own needs, mistakes, and perspective, contact him to arrange for a face-to-face discussion/lunch date in a quiet, neutral location (not your home). Panera, for example, is a good place because you can stay for several hours uninterrupted while you have a private conversation.

If you are truly sorry and feel responsible for your inappropriate behavior, then start out by totally owning it and telling him that you are sorry -- regardless of where your relationship leads. He needs to know that you realize you treated him badly. Ask if he can accept your apology. Tell him what he means to you. Describe to him how he is still the man that you fell in love with 23 years ago and what your dreams for the future are, should you be able to get through this crisis together. Ask where he sees the marriage going, and really let him talk. If he is open to a future together, ask whether he will go to couples therapy with you. If he won't go, then this is not a great sign.

Let him know that you are working on "you" in the interim. Even if he isn't ready to forgive, leave the door open to your relationship. Beginning ASAP, it would be helpful to seek individual counseling for yourself to work on any unresolved issues of anger or untreated mental health issues such as depression. This will help you regardless of whether he is in your life.

Question: I have tried my best way to apologize to someone who loved me, but he's completely unwilling to give me another chance. What can I do?

Answer: You've already tried to earnestly apologize for whatever you did to break the trust between you. Please understand that it is his choice to forgive you or not. (Forgiveness is a gift -- one we give both the other person AND at the same time ourselves because the hurt will cause pain for the grudge-holder.)

He has chosen not to extend you this gift, so the only thing you can do at this point is to let him know that the door is always open, you'll leave him alone, and that you'll respect his decision. We cannot make people love us and cannot force them to accept our sincere apologies. Go live your life and let him live his.

Question: Out of desperation I accepted money from a man and allowed him to watch me while he touched himself, but there was no contact, sexual or otherwise. My wife walked in and saw this. Now she won't speak to me. This was a one-time occurrence and I was in a hopeless place. Now I don't know what to do. She means everything to me. Any help?

Answer: Regardless of whether there was sexual contact between you and this other man, you completely betrayed your wife's trust. You were a willing participant in a sexual act regardless of what you may claim. You played a visual stimulating role instead of a tactile, interactive role. You don't say whether you were unclothed as well or whether this was a stranger or friend. The fact that you did this for money adds another complicating layer. Sexual activity for payment IS technically prostitution. Your wife has to wonder if you'd do this, what else have you done or what else would you do?

You broke all kinds of personal boundaries here, friend. Your wife has to be shocked, ashamed, terribly disappointed, and very angry. You must do some soul searching. If it's a shared money situation (which with spouses you'd assume it is, right?), then she has to understand what a terrible predicament you found yourself in. She felt and feels the financial desperation, too. However, she's not engaging in prostitution, is she?

I'm thinking there's something else going on that affects chiefly your finances. Consider what the root cause was behind your desperation. Although money was your surface need or motivator, I'm thinking that drug addiction, gambling, or some similar personal situation was the real driver for you to cross such a moral line. That is what you need help with. Go to her and ask her for help with that (e.g., rehab, counseling). Make sure she knows how much you care. If you've never had intercourse outside of marriage, say so and ask two things: marriage counseling and how to make this right by her.

Question: I love three girls. One loves me dearly and she can only kiss me. The other one loves me more than anything and she can't allow me to kiss her. The third one I have sex with her whenever I want. She claims that she loves me, but I doubt it. My question is: whom should I choose among these three?

Answer: I'm afraid that you've gotten love and affection--or more precisely SEX--confused. I suspect you don't love ANY of these girls, although you may believe that you do. I also suspect that you at least tell them each that you love them, although that may be just a tactic to get more physical in your relationships with them. You deserve a deeper emotional connection than this. You'll find that it's actually more satisfying and rewarding.

You will learn that later when you are truly in love with someone, you don't want to be with anyone else romantically. (At least, I hope you will learn this.) When you're in love, you can't stop talking or thinking about that special someone. Your whole world revolves around seeing them and making them happy, even if that means making sacrifices like not becoming intimate with other people or even moving across the country with them because that's where they got a new job. You think about a future together. You respect them as a person with thoughts, feelings, and opinions. You take care of them when they are sick, sad, or grieving. You want to know as much as you can about who they truly are, what makes them click, and what their childhood was like. You accept their flaws, moodiness, and mistakes as a part of their makeup. That's being in love, and notice it's absolutely not the same as sex.

In contrast, you reference how much THEY love YOU and how far they'll give up sexually. That's not love. The third girl is probably hooking up with you in an unspoken friends-with-benefits type arrangement. You need to clarify with her how you really feel about one another. Be brutally honest. Are you just using one another for convenient sex? Be careful because babies can get made with what you're doing and you don't even seem to have genuine feelings for one another. The arrangement is also hindering you from emotionally connecting with other girls who could prove to be a genuine love interest.

As far as the two other girls, I'm glad they don't let you get any further. Take dating slow and get to know them (or whomever you date) as people before you declare love. Out of honesty, you should tell Girl 1 and 2 about each other and that you had been seeing Girl 3 all along. They deserve to know who you really are, and if they forgive and accept you for your this, you're well on your way to establishing more a genuine, trusting, mature relationship. If what you're looking for isn't love but instead just physical, stop playing with people's hearts and be a little more forthcoming. Good luck in establishing a better quality, more fulfilling relationship that actually involves love in the future. I know that eventually love will happen for you if you just grow up a little.

Question: How can I prove I did not cheat on my boyfriend? My boyfriend believed I cheated on him and would not stop questioning me. When I finally had enough I lied about everything just to get him to stop asking questions. Now, he blames me for breaking us up but I am innocent! He will not stand for the truth.

Answer: Under enough duress, many people will falsely confess to things they did not do just to get the questions to stop. They believe the only "right" answer that will alleviate their extreme stress of the moment is to give the interviewer what he or she wants, even if it is not true -- confirmation that they engaged in behavior that they're being accused of and questioned aggressively about.

You're requesting help in proving to him that you're innocent, but his mind is made up. If you were to reconcile he would always hang this over your head -- your lying, the questionable status of the cheating. Don't go back.

You should be more worried that he engaged in such demanding and aggressive questioning that you felt so powerless and desperate that you falsely admitted to cheating just to escape the situation. What right did he have to badger you like this? He did not just challenge your integrity by alleging you cheated. He BULLIED you into a false confession. Be happy you are rid of this guy. It's emotionally ABUSIVE behavior. Down the line, you'd be seeing more than the recent verbal aggression, jealousy, and angry accusations. What he demonstrated should be as deal-breaking as if he slapped you.

Sweet girl, stop your ex-boyfriend's blame game. Break off all communication with him for good. It's better to be alone than be treated like this. Demand to be treated with respect and dignity in all personal interactions.

Question: I have left my wife and children. I tried to convince myself that it was the right thing to do as I kept hurting her. I tried to pretend I was happy and okay walking away, but I am not. Deep inside, my heart is in bits. Unfortunately, I am too proud to say sorry. I don’t know how. I have let down those who matter the most to me. I have left them feeling unwanted and unloved, when in truth they are wanted and loved so deeply. Are there any songs to try and tell her I am sorry?

Answer: You say that you keep hurting her, and now you have walked out. I don't know if that means serial infidelity, a substance abuse problem, or some other behavioral issue, but you should strongly consider committing yourself to a concrete plan for real and lasting change, regardless of whether she takes you back. This is for your own psychological health first. Contact a licensed counselor/psychotherapist who can help you with expressing your feelings and dealing with the root cause(s) of what drove you from your family. You may request that your wife join you in couples therapy as well.

If you're looking for a simple song, a good place to start is 3 Doors Down's "Here Without You" (2003). YouTube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlDInVqv8cs&t=... However, I urge you ABSOLUTELY NOT TO SKIP THE APOLOGY -- PLEASE. Right now, during the holiday season, your wife and children are feeling intense rejection. Your timing for leaving was especially bad, as holidays heighten such feelings.

Do not play with their emotions by going back and forth from the family home if you do not have an action plan for becoming a better man. Don't continue to hurt your wife (and thus your children -- yes, they are hurt, too, by whatever you are doing to your marriage). Don't be surprised if they are all angry as well as heartbroken. There's no way that skipping the apology will fix this. It's cowardly. You need a long come-to-Jesus confessional with your wife.

Set a date in advance with her. Bring her roses and arrange to talk alone outside earshot of the kids. Tell her what she means to you, WHY you make a huge mistake, and that you need her help (i.e., share your plan for change). You probably said and did a lot of things when leaving to justify your actions, and now you have to explain why you were wrong. I hope she'll do what is right for her and the kids, whatever that is. I wish you well in getting through this rough patch in your marriage.

Question: I broke up with my boyfriend because I was dealing with very deep emotional issues and couldn't handle a relationship at the time. I had been friends with another guy and kind of liked him. I feel the break up was a mistake but I don't want to hurt this new guy's feelings. (I'm a big part of why he still wakes up, literally.) Any advice or songs to send either one of them?

Answer: You seem to be going through some emotional turbulence, and you've connected with a new guy who is similarly experiencing such difficulties right now. It may be best to have a cooling off period in which you don't date anyone exclusively. Instead, just concentrate on getting emotionally healthy.

If your new male friend is depressed, please encourage him to seek counseling. It may be biochemical in nature. Depression is very treatable, and he doesn't have to feel like this. Your comment about you being the reason why he literally still wakes up prompts me to also mention that if he is thinking about harming himself, make sure you provide him with the following resources:

1) National Hopeline Network 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433)

If you or someone you know are depressed and considering suicide, call the National Hopeline Network at 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433). The call is free and confidential. Or chat live with a crisis volunteer at http://hopeline.com/.

2) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.TALK (8255)

Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to talk with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. Available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Note that the National Suicide Prevention website lists additional, special hotline numbers for Spanish speakers, people with hearing impairments and veterans in crisis, and people facing distress related to natural disasters: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-some...

3) Crisis Text Line Number 741741

If you're in crisis and prefer to text rather than call, then here's a confidential crisis text line staffed nationally by trained counselors in suicide prevention. Text "HOME" to 741741 from anywhere in the United States.

You can let your ex-boyfriend know that you were (and probably still are) dealing with difficult emotional issues, needed some space, and did not mean to hurt him. If he truly cares about you and values your relationship then he should be able to appreciate that sometimes life can be messy, complex, and overwhelming. Sometimes people need to work through a difficult emotional situation without the complications of a relationship to distract them, as relationships do take work. If he's sensitive to what you're telling him and wants to be a part of your life in some way, perhaps you can start to bring him in on what those emotional issues are and include him. Be honest with both yourself and him about whether you are ready to jump back into a dating relationship. Who says you have to date right away? Take things slow.

Above all, don't put yourself in a situation in which you feel like you have to hide from one guy that you're talking to another. Be honest with both of them immediately and let them deal with their own feelings and you deal with yours. Good luck on getting everything in your life straightened out. I wish you health and happiness.

Question: Last year, I walked out on the man I was supposed to marry after a major fight. I moved four hours away and never said goodbye but we love each other. He told my sister it was for the best because I deserve better and he is a loser. I've tried to call him many times and left messages. He has no phone of his own. I heard he moved on the next day with another woman. He still won't speak to me. I don't know how to let him know it’s ok and that doesn't change anything. Can you help?

Answer: I don't know what the core issue you were fighting about was or who was legitimately in the wrong, but if you broke off an engagement, moved four hours away and never said goodbye, it had to be a BIG blow up. (This was no way to start a marriage, so it's a mixed blessing that it happened before the wedding rather than after.) This huge issue apparently never had closure for you if you're still thinking about him. However, he rebounded the next night with another woman and as emotional punishment to you now won't return any of your messages.

If you truly owe him an apology, you can write him a letter since he's not in the mindframe to hear your voice. You must have his address or the address of a friend, neighbor, or relative of his who can deliver this letter to him. Mark on the outside "To be opened by addressee only." Hopefully that will help ensure that a roommate or other person doesn't open his mail. Say what you need to say and give your contact information, if you want to. Tell him your purpose is to apologize. Less is more so don't ramble. Just own whatever you need to say sorry for.

He has told your sister that he is a loser and you deserve better. He doesn't have a phone and doesn't seem financially stable. He's rebuffed your attempts to contact him and immediately rebounded with another woman. I don't know what the backstory is there, but think long and hard about whether he's right for you. Is he the loser he claims to be? Apologizing is very different from reuniting. Be very clear in advance what you want and why so that you can be clear in what you communicate. Otherwise, you may wind up reliving -- and probably repeating -- the past.

Question: I am trying to say that I'm sorry to my parents with a song after everything I have done. Do you have any suggestions on what I should use?

Answer: The best thing that you can do is continue along a positive path. That's what all parents want for their kids, not apologies. Don't wear the guilt of your transgressions like a badge of shame. Parents understand missteps as a part of maturing. If you want to honor your parents, consider a song about how much they mean to you. Here's a Spinditty playlist of songs about mothers, for example: http://hub.me/alZbF. Small, random acts often mean the world: hugs, a card with a warm message, or taking them out to lunch on occasion.

Question: I’m trying to tell a girl that I've loved her for awhile by sending her a song, since I can’t seem to say it. I don't want to regret holding this back. Do you have any suggestions?

Answer: The following song describes a young woman's physical and inner beauty from the perspective of a guy who seeks to start a relationship with her: "Beautiful Soul" by Jesse McCartney (2004). If you look at the lyrics, you'll notice that it seems perfect for your situation. If you want ideas for additional songs, there are several others that would also be appropriate on the following playlist:

https://spinditty.com/playlists/Beauty-Playlist-So... .

Another idea is REO Speedwagon's 1984 fabulous song, "I Can't Fight This Feeling." Here's the YouTube link to it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpOULjyy-n8.

Question: I have betrayed a true friend. She has always been honest, loving, and caring, I was naive and ended up hurting her. As a result, I lost part of the closeness we once had, and it hurts inside when I think of what I did when at the time I was under the influence. Have you got any suggestions?

Answer: None of us are perfect, and we've each done things we are regretful of. Ask for her forgiveness.

If your friend will hear you out in person, that is best. Take her by the hands, look at her in the eyes, and confess your humanity. Let her know that you failed her as a friend. If she won't meet with you personally, then write your message down in a card. Express sincere remorse and ownership for your behavior, regardless of being under the influence. After all, it was your choice to drink to excess.

Express what she means to you and ask for her ideas on how to make this right. Be willing to offer up some ideas. Make sure she knows it will never happen again -- and deliver on that promise! Trust isn't rebuilt in a day. Ultimately, convince her that you have learned something important (how much her friendship means) and you are trying to be a better person and a better friend.

Question: I violated my boyfriend's trust, and then I lied about it. He found out and is really mad at me. How should I fix things?

Answer: None of us are perfect human beings. You made mistakes and all you can do at this point is ask to talk to him in person. Look him in the face when you apologize and face towards him. That's a start.

First, accept responsibility for your actions by admitting what you did (e.g., "I went out with John behind your back and covered it up by lying to you"). Don't add qualifiers or try to explain it away (e.g., I was feeling lonely because of you ... ") because this is about how YOU own what you did. Attempts to explain it away will make matters worse at this point. Make sure you offer a heartfelt apology.

Second, describe how your behavior impacted him, how it made him feel. This lets him know that you truly get what you did to him.

Third, tell him what he means to you and ask how you can begin to make this right. If he is not to start forgiving you, then tell him you'd like to talk more with him in another few days to see if he is open to working with you to repair the broken trust in your relationship.

Question: I asked a girl to kiss me on Instagram, but she did not reply. Instead, she complained to her boyfriend. I cleared the air with the boyfriend but am still feeling guilty. What should I do?

Answer: You cleared the air with the girl's boyfriend. Make sure you also apologize to the girl herself. Don't overdo it, just apologize and ask to be friends again. After the apology, it then becomes an issue of getting over your awkwardness. In other words, it's a "you" issue that you'll have to get past. Only time will solve it. People make mistakes. Stop beating yourself up after you've made amends. And no more asking for kisses or other sexual contact via social media.

Question: I told my friend I would hurt myself if she didn't do what I wanted her to do, and she ended up crying. How do I apologize?

Answer: Threatening to hurt yourself in order to get someone else to do what you want is extremely manipulative. Acknowledge that to her and the fact that it was wrong. Describe how it must have made her feel. Offer your apology, ask forgiveness, and tell her you will never do it again. Also, consider consulting a psychologist because this is some pretty extreme behavior and I'm concerned that you may repeat it or genuinely turn to self-harm when stress becomes intense.

Question: I lost the woman I love. After a long time of being denied attention, and being falsely convinced that she was cheating, I flirted with another girl. As bad as that was, that was as far as it got. I could never imagine being with anyone else. I guess always coming up second best enraged her and she told my ex. After I realized my stupidity and stopped, she kicked me out and waited a month to dump me. We still talk. What songs match up that I can send her? More importantly, what do I do?

Answer: Although you flirted, a generally healthy, trusting relationship should be able to weather some mild flirtation. Is she that jealous or was it considerably more than mild flirtation? I'm not 100% certain you own your full role in this, as you still reference that you were denied attention and tricked into thinking she was cheating.

Should you reunite as a couple, you will need to pour a lot of effort into building trust. I recommend a couple's counselor if this is a serious commitment. I have found that the single most genuine and effective method for making amends is a humble, heartfelt question: "What do I need to do to make this right?" Listen intently and nondefensively and commit to change. As for a song, I recommend "All Out of Love" by Air Supply.

Question: A man was previously in love with me, and I pushed him away until he gave up on me. Now I'm deeply in love with him. Is there any possible chance for us to get back together?

Answer: One has to wonder what changed so drastically to prompt your change of feelings? It's enough to give one emotional whiplash. Rather than confuse the matter, try taking it slow with him. Re-introduce yourself into his life, slowly get to know him again as he currently is (if he is still single), and build trust. Reveal your feelings bit by bit and describe what was going on in your head and heart when you rejected him. Make sure you have your emotional house in order. Do you really love him or just love the thought of being wanted/being in love?

Question: I have regrets. There is someone who loves me like crazy, but my love for him faded away. I broke up with him, and now I'm with someone else. I want to express that I didn't do that to hurt him. But because of all those years trying to give him what he wanted, the two of us just don't work out. I still love him but not in a romantic way, and I NEVER meant to hurt him. After years, I decided to work on my happiness too. That is specific but what kind of song could I send?

Answer: Here are two suggestions. First, there's the 1992 song, "Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough" by Patty Smyth (featuring Don Henley) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdzbjUWu2VU. Second, Celine Dion's 1992 song, "I Love You, Goodbye" may also be fitting https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UwESpbE0KuY.

More importantly, however, be careful of two things:

1) sending him a song with lyrics that express messages he may interpret differently than how you mean them. Be sure he gets the message that the relationship is OVER and understands why you're sharing this particular song. Put that part in your own words, so he doesn't read into anything.

2) continuing to communicate with him regularly probably prolongs the breakup and pain for you both. It's easier to do a clean break, although it hurts like hell for the first few weeks.

Question: I hurt a friend that means a lot to me. I want to make a playlist saying sorry without declaring my love for them. A lot of these songs are about being in love. Can you suggest any songs that are not about being in love?

Answer: I’m sorry for your loss. His next of kin needs to contact a donation site. Although I suspect they refuse the donation because of the length of time his body has been unpreserved, it’s important to attempt to honor his wishes. My uncle was a big, tall man with leukemia who had undergone extensive chemo and radiation that ravaged his body yet the state medical school did accept his body. He was returned cremated within a year.

Question: I lied to someone I really love. Although we're not together, I hurt him deeply, and after apologizing to him, I hurt him again. I really want him to forgive me, but I don't know the right words to say or what to do. What should I say?

Answer: You violated his trust not once but twice. Do some deep reflection about what led you to do so. The biggest predictor of future behavior is past behavior. Why would he trust you now? You need to focus your energy on demonstrating trustworthiness. Apologize earnestly and tell him you are focusing on being a better person.

Question: I made this girl I like really mad. Right before that she was debating if she should go out with me. I accidentally told people we were going out when we weren't. What song would be best?

Answer: You do need to apologize and ask if you can start over. Make your apology to her relatable. We've all had one of those situations where we've gotten ahead of ourselves, nothing seemed to go right, then bad events turned to worse. See if she can understand that experience. Tell her how awful you feel about it happening and how you wish you could have a redo or make it right because she's so special to you. Then, especially if she is still unconvinced, maybe present a written list of the top 10 reasons she should give you a second chance. Hint: make some of the reasons funny, make some of them endearing. Here is a list of song ideas for background mood music:

“We Can Work It Out” by The Beatles (1965)

“Take a Chance on Me” by ABBA (1978)

“You Make My Dreams Come True” by Hall & Oates (1981)

"Smile" by Kracker (2009)

“With a Little Luck” Paul McCartney & Wings (1977)

“I Can’t Fight This Feeling Anymore” by REO Speedwagon (1984)

Although some of these are apology songs, you don't necessarily have to go with that type of song, as many such tunes are about broken romantic relationships and yours hasn't really started yet. Whatever the case, best of luck in winning her over. I hope this was helpful!

Question: I pushed someone who loves me very much away from me because I didn’t realize I felt the same way for him. Now he’s unwilling to forgive me. What should I do?

Answer: Give him some space first as you collect your thoughts. If he truly loves you, he's going to miss you like crazy. Then contact him to ask for a face-to-face meeting. Give your one last best pitch to him in which you apologize and lay it all out on the line, holding nothing back. You have ONE last chance to do this, and this is it.

If he refuses to meet with you, make a pre-recorded YouTube video (marked private so the whole world isn't able to view it) and send him the link. The video should be a video of you talking straight to the camera and pouring your heart out as if you were talking face-to-face. Apologize and request forgiveness without excuses. Talk about memories, what he means to you, and what you want for your future together. Add photos of you both and background music for additional emotional impact at the end if you're technically inclined.

Make sure you have the big "ask" at the end. What are you asking him to do? Call you, be your boyfriend, move in? Also tell him that if his answer is no, you'll respect his decision and won't contact him again.

The benefit of using a private YouTube video is that you'll know how many times if any, he's viewed it because it's only viewable to those who have the link. Make sure it's marked private!

I hope this helps.

Question: A comment I made was taken wrong by friends. What's a good song to say I'm sorry?

Answer: Just remember that true friends will forgive you if you apologize. To answer your question, how about the rock 1989 song by Cher, "If I Could Turn Back Time"? Here are the regret-filled lyrics:

If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I'd take back those words that've hurt you

And you'd stay

I don't know why I did the things I did

I don't know why I said the things I said

Pride's like a knife it can cut deep inside

Words are like weapons they wound sometimes

I didn't really mean to hurt you

I didn't wanna see you go

I know I made you cry, but baby

If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I'd take back those words that've hurt you

And you'd stay

If I could reach the stars

I'd give them all to you

Then you'd love me, love me

Like you used to do

If I could turn back time

My world was shattered I was torn apart

Like someone took a knife and drove it deep in my heart

You walked out that door I swore that I didn't care

But I lost everything darling then and there

Too strong to tell you I was sorry

Too proud to tell you I was wrong

I know that I was blind, and darling

If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I'd take back those words that've hurt you

And you'd stay

If I could reach the stars

I'd give them all to you

Then you'd love me, love me

Like you used to do

Oh

If I could turn back time

If I could turn back time

If I could turn back time

Oh baby

I didn't really mean to hurt you

I didn't want to see you go

I know I made you cry, but oh

If I could turn back time

If I could find a way

I'd take back those words that've hurt you

If I could reach the stars

I'd give them all to you

Then you'd love me, love me

Like you used to do

If I could turn back time (Turn back time)

If I could find a way (Find a way)

Then maybe, maybe, maybe

You'd stay

Reach the stars

If I could reach the stars...

Question: I am meeting other suitors up until a deadline set by my parents so that they will finally agree to let me be with my love if none others work. This makes me feel bad for what he is going through. Which song says sorry for putting him through this ?

Answer: It's unfortunate in today's world that your family is not permitting you to freely and fully choose to marry the individual you love. They are inserting a level of control and interference into the process. Although your parents want what they think is best for you, they don't fully embrace the notion that this decision is THE most important one of your young life. It needs to be yours rather than theirs. Perhaps this is an issue of culture and tradition, but it concerns me greatly because the secret to happiness and success in life can largely be found in who you marry. My thoughts are with you as you do what is best for your happiness and your future. My opinion: always choose love.

Rather than apologize to your beloved, why not offer him hope and reassurance instead? Several songs come to mind from my Spinditty playlist of songs about waiting for someone you love: https://spinditty.com/playlists/Songs-About-Waitin... These include:

1) "I Will Wait" by Mumford & Sons (2012)

2) "Unchained Melody" by The Righteous Brothers (1965)

3) "Patience" by Guns 'N Roses (1988)

4) "Save the Best for Last" by Vanessa Williams (1991)

I hope this helps.

Question: I've nearly ruined my friendship with my best friend because I do not like her new boyfriend and have been judging and criticizing her to the point of hurting her feelings instead of supporting her. What song can I use to show her I care?

Answer: Rather than send an apology song, why not let your friend know that you love and support her and want the best but that sometimes you're human and fall short? Couple your personal message with a song from the Songs About Supporting Someone and Being There playlist http://hub.me/akzbb. I suggest, for example:

1) "That's What Friends Are For" (1985) by Dionne Warwick and Friends

2) "Count On Me" (1996) by Whitney Houston and CeCe Winanas, or

3) "Count On Me" (2010) by Bruno Mars.

As far as the guy is concerned, if he isn't good for her, she'll hopefully see it sooner or later. She has to learn to trust your judgment and you, hers. However, this is her mistake to make.

Question: My friend said some dumb shit to his girlfriend that hurt her feelings, and now he wants to sing to her. Any song suggestions?

Answer: Your candor made me laugh. He probably asked for your help with finding a song. It depends on what stupid stuff he said, but he probably issued some insults that made her feel bad about herself and the relationship. "Just the Way You Are" by Billy Joel (1977) is a phenomenal love song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iilBF_LFKmg

Lyrics:

Don't go changing to try and please me

You never let me down before

Don't imagine you're too familiar

And I don't see you anymore

I wouldn't leave you in times of trouble

We never could have come this far

I took the good times; I'll take the bad times

I'll take you just the way you are

Don't go trying some new fashion

Don't change the color of your hair

You always have my unspoken passion

Although I might not seem to care

I don't want clever conversation

I never want to work that hard

I just want someone that I can talk to

I want you just the way you are

I need to know that you will always be

The same old someone that I knew

What will it take till you believe in me

The way that I believe in you?

I said I love you and that's forever

And this I promise from the heart

I could not love you any better

I love you just the way you are.

Question: I pranked my boyfriend that I was pregnant, and his parents kicked him out of the house as a result. I confessed the truth, but now his whole family detests me. What can I do to show how sorry I am about my prank?

Answer: Oh, that's tasteless. There is an unspoken list of taboo topics when it comes to jokes or pranks: death and dying, disabilities, pregnancy, abortion, sexual assault and abuse, terrorism, school shootings, and Hitler/Holocaust/Anne Frank.

Your unfortunate prank had real repercussions with your boyfriend's parents kicking him out. Right now they aren't supportive of your relationship, although he still continues to see you. The best you can hope for right now is polite acknowledgment, and you get that by consistently behaving in a responsible and mature manner. You may try to write them a sincere apology letter with a card, asking for personal forgiveness. Tell them it was an immature joke in poor taste and you didn't know what you were thinking. You didn't understand the ramifications of your actions; if you could undo it or make amends you absolutely would. Say that you are sorry. Do not expect that it will automatically result in the desired consequences but make the effort. They may treat you poorly but don't return the ugly behavior. Remember who caused this and be the bigger person.

© 2016 FlourishAnyway

Comments

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 21, 2020:

Crissy - I've spent about an hour trying to find this on lyrics databases to no avail. So sorry! Perhaps a reader will recognize the lyrics and comment.

Chrissy on May 21, 2020:

Hello! Please I'm seriously trying to find an apology song by these words :

I'm down on my knees

Begging you please

Don't say it's too late

For more apologies

Try to understand

That I'll do what I can

So that we can be together again

Again... again...

It's was realeaed somewhere around 2010.

I just cant find this song anywhere!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 01, 2019:

Lora - I find that "Cat's In the Cradle" to be such a bittersweet song. Kids do grow up quickly. Even if you did the best you could I think there will always be regrets. Thank you for such a warm comment and note of encouragement.

Lora Hollings on July 31, 2019:

A great playlist of songs about regret, apologies and feeling sad, Flourish. You did a splendid job! Life gets away from us before we even know it and so many times it's too late to even express our apologies to those that we love. It is better to say your sorry than to let this happen. Although, I like so many of these songs, I have to say my favorite on this list is "Cat's In the Cradle" by Harry Chapin. This song has such a profound message that sadly sums up so many relationships in families. Children grow up so fast and if we are not part of their lives, then they will not know us and vice versa. And what a loss that is! And we do teach our children by example so it is likely that this sad state of affairs will repeat themselves. Thanks for these songs that really make us think about life as it is unfolding in the present so that we don’t always have to look back and regret what we did or didn’t do.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 28, 2019:

Andie - I'm sorry about how sad you're feeling.

Thomas Rhett has a great 2017 country song called "Marry Me" about a guy who is in love with a female friend who is getting married to someone else. You might also try my playlist, songs about the friend zone, https://hubpages.com/playlists/Songs-About-the-Fri...

Andie on June 28, 2019:

Do you have any song recommendations about wishing you told someone how you felt, knowing that you’re never going to see them again? I’ve been in love with this person for so long, and I never told him how I felt, because he’s married, and I know I shouldn’t have told him anyways. But now I feel like I wish he knew the truth. And I’m not ever going to see him again. I use songs to cope and I can’t seem to find any songs with lyrics that I really relate to :(

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on March 22, 2019:

Anonymous - Thank you for sharing. None of us has been a perfect friend, parent, child, employee, etc. You realize your opportunity for change, so work on becoming a better person and making up for any ways that you have hurt people you love. All you can do is try.

Anonymous on March 22, 2019:

My biggest regret so far, is never thinking before i do rash things. It always gets me in trouble with the people i love and i hate it. I’ve hurt my best friend and I don’t know if she will forgive me.

Thanks for reading.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on March 06, 2019:

Angel - Revenge cheating doesn't help anyone, and the person it's most unfair to is usually the person cheated with. Often they don't know they're just a pawn. Thanks for sharing your story. Hope you've learned something.

Angel on March 06, 2019:

I loved a guy for a month, then other girls started getting in our way and soon I found out he was cheating in me. I was so pissed that I wanted to hurt him back, so I went out with another guy just to show him what he was doing to me. It worked and I got him back but things started to get out of control to the point I lost both guys. I'm sill in love with the first guy, from that first day he came into my life. It was like he was an angel. Sent from god.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 21, 2019:

Tim, That's funny. I'm not sure how he does it either.

I think as we grow older we become who we truly are, unburdened by some of the overwhelming pressures and expectations of youth. With shortened time, focus becomes clearer. I know that's been true for me.

Thanks for stopping by. Have a wonderful week!

Tim Truzy from U.S.A. on February 20, 2019:

Hi, Flourish,

My greatest regret is when I was young not taking enough time to smell the roses, but now, every day, I make every moment count.

Besides, Willy Nelson said it best: "Regret is just a memory, written on my brow, and ther's nothing I can do about it now."

Excellent play list, Flourish. I like many of these songs, but Chicago's "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" is one of my favorites. How Peter can sing that high and not loose a part of his body is beyond me.

Thanks for another well written, informative article.

Loved the steps on apologizing.

Sincerely,

Tim

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 06, 2019:

Elizabeth - I can certainly appreciate that you feel frazzled and out of control right now. You've expressed issues with trust, ADHD, depression, inappropriate anger/lashing out, and an attempt at suicide. Your priority should not be your love life but rather your mental health. Discuss your issues with your parents and/or the healthcare provider who prescribed the ADHD and depression meds. Do not wait.

If you are in crisis and feel like you may harm yourself, call 911 for immediate life-saving assistance. You may also contact one of the following resources for talk or text support:

1) National Hopeline Network 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433)

If you or someone you know are depressed and considering suicide, call the National Hopeline Network at 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433). Your call is free and confidential. Or chat live with a crisis volunteer at http://hopeline.com/.

2) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.TALK (8255)

Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to talk with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. Available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Note that the National Suicide Prevention website lists additional, special hotline numbers for Spanish speakers, people with hearing impairments and veterans in crisis, and people facing distress related to natural disasters: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-some...

3) Crisis Text Line Number 741741

Finally, please be sure to access this terrific resource: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ which describes action steps to take if you are feeling suicidal.

If you're in crisis and prefer to text rather than call, then here's a confidential crisis text line staffed nationally by trained counselors in suicide prevention. Text "HOME" to 741741 from anywhere in the United States.

Keep this information handy (in your wallet or stored on your phone) so that you have it in case you get in a bad place emotionally and need it urgently.

Boyfriends come and go, but you need to attend to your health. Take care of YOU.

Elizabeth on February 05, 2019:

Hi my name is Elizabeth i am 15 i have hurt my boyfriend an i want to explain what happened and i want to know how to fix it. So i started accusing him of cheating on me. And also i get jealous and then i don't like when he is talking to girls so i tell him i don't like the person he is talking to bc i feel like maybe they like him or they are trying to take him from me. I have had a ex who cheated on me with a friend and i asked her if they were together and she lied. I forgot to take my depression meds and ADHD meds that day we got into a fight. I got mad and said things out of anger and didn't mean them also i got depressed and tried to overdose myself and i told him this was all his fault i wasn't thinking and i feel terrible because i am his second girlfriend. And he is my first actual love his parents are Catholic they found out because he was crying and never cries they asked what was wrong and he told them. They said that we need to break up and he thinks that they maybe won't let us get back together i know how to get better i have apologized and he says he forgives me. But i feel like he doesn't know if he wants to be with me because i hurt him and got mad at him or upset with him over the littles things i was also on my period and still am i need your opinion

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 23, 2019:

Faith - It is simply going to take time to show him that you've changed for good and the lifestyle you used to have is truly in your past. You need to change for your own sake ultimately, regardless of whether you end up with him. If he doesn't see the change as permanent, someone else will value you for the good choices you are now making in your life. Don't despair.

Faith on January 22, 2019:

I once had a very bad life style, due to friends and family background and I meet this guy whom I love so much during this bad area of my and gradually he stopped me from living those life style I will stop for a bit and later go back to them but gradually I took a decision and stopped finanly but he is not seeing d change in me no matter how hard I try. And sometimes I feel we won't end up together and he is just keeping me. How do I make him believe am a change person and he is the reason for that. How do I get him back.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 20, 2018:

Markleo45 - Thanks for helping. We'll wait for a response from Christopher to see if this is it!

Markleo45 on November 19, 2018:

@Christopher, are you talking about Chris Cagle's song( Look at What I Done To Her)?

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 11, 2018:

Christopher - I've spent several hours trying to find the song you're referring to, but lyrics searches and other attempts haven't identified your song. It may be a really new singer or perhaps a song without wide coverage yet.

As an alternative, you might try either 1) Chris Young's "The Man I Want To Be" (2009) or 2) Robby Johnson's "Together" (2016). Note also that I have a playlist called "Songs About Reunited Love and Getting Back Together Again" which you may want to check out. http://hub.me/akElu

Good luck in wooing your partner back. Look her in the eye as you pour your heart out. She'll never forget it. Been there on the receiving end way back when and it worked.

Christopher from Mississippi on November 11, 2018:

It’s a country song but the guy delivers more lyrically kinda like Sam hunt does on the montevallo album. He talks about looking back and knowing now what h e didn’t know then.. and says something about being ready. That’s all I got I know it isn’t much but I’m trying everything I know to get lyrics bits to put this together. The artist is fairly new as well

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 11, 2018:

Christopher - Can you tell me especially if it's a country or pop/rock song? Any lyrics you recall? Is it on radio stations now?

Christopher from Mississippi on November 10, 2018:

I’m looking for a song the singer is a guy and it’s fairly new I’m sure.. he talks about being younger and immature and not being ready to settle down with this girl but he finally grew up and matured and is ready to settle down and wants her back and it being a little too late. I really want to find this song, if you can help me please let me know who this artist is and the name of the song. Thank you!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 15, 2018:

Alyssa - Great addition. I appreciate you.

Alyssa on September 14, 2018:

A suggestion I have is NF Let You Down

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 21, 2018:

Msdg - You must have had some reason to make the accusations, even though they turned out to be untrue. Once his anger subsides, ask him to hear you out. Explain rationally how you came to your conclusion, ask for understanding, and apologize for making an unfounded accusation. Ask for a second chance to rebuild trust between you. That's about all you can do.

Msdg on August 21, 2018:

I wrongly accused my boyfriend of cheating. And now he aint talking to me and said hes done. What can i do or say..

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 20, 2018:

Gwynfryn Williams - First, I love your name! Second, thank you for the song recommendation. I've added it to not only the current playlist but also several other related playlists. Have an awesome day!

Gwynfryn Williams on June 18, 2018:

Recommendation: “Fall” by Sasha Sloan (2018). The narrator regrets breaking up with her ex and she wants to get back together and apologize, regardless if the other person has moved on.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 10, 2018:

Thomas Meadows - Good regret song. Thanks for the suggestion! It's #49 now. Have a great weekend.

Thomas Meadows on May 10, 2018:

How about "I want you back" by Jackson 5

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 05, 2018:

Andrew - Thanks for that addition! It's now #48. Have a good weekend, no regrets!

Andrew on May 05, 2018:

I was wrong-social distortion

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 02, 2018:

swiggerlaps - Friends forgive, and you should make the humblest of apologies, given that you said some awful things and she's blaming herself. Apologize without making excuses then have a good talk about how to have a better friendship in which you treat one another with respect.

swiggerlaps on May 01, 2018:

I said some awful things to my bestfriend earlier today, that I wish I could just snatch right back up, because she never deserved any hurt or pain I caused her. I'm trying to make it right and it's 12:12 am right now, but she always says she'd give me another chance, this is the time where I should change myself for the better, before I do this again, she said what I told her will make her work on herself, but I did the opposite and said it in a vulgar/rude way. I wanna snatch those words back right now, but I really can't. I can just make the situation better by sorting it out, and realizing what I did was absolutely wrong.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 10, 2018:

Friend of only a shadow - I hope this means Rita is doing better. Thank you for the update.

Friend of only a shadow on January 09, 2018:

My friend posted on here just over a year ago, she went by the title 'only a shadow'. I wanted to thank you to you & everyone else who was able to help her even in a small bit.

After her conversations with you she had a better few months, however there was times I thought I would lose her. Finding different songs in your posts for her has really helped her.

To everyone: Music can save lives. Especially the right kind.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on December 07, 2017:

Country girl - Best of luck.

Country girl on December 07, 2017:

Thanks i hope that with the little bit of lyrics i took from these so gs that my bff will forgive me.

Maddy on October 31, 2017:

Thank you. I'll do that. I just hope he forgives me. And I hope nothing changes between us. Because he means so much to me. And I would never forgive myself if I ruined our friendship

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 31, 2017:

Maddy - That's so sad. You've already apologized to him, but it may be necessary to do so again. Don't go into lengthy explanations or justifications. Say you were wrong, acknowledge how it made him feel, tell him you want to make it right, and ask for forgiveness. If he will not talk with you, write a letter. Less is more.

Maddy on October 31, 2017:

Hi, my name is Maddy and I'm 15. I really hurt my best friend today. And Now I feel like we'll never be the same. I have apologized to him. But now I feel like I messed up our friendship. And i dont know what to do. Or how to fix this. Because I value our friendship and I don't wanna lose it or him.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 05, 2017:

Anto - Thanks so much for these suggestions! Have a great day, no regrets.

Anto on September 03, 2017:

A few suggestions...

So. Central Rain (I'm Sorry) by R.E.M.

The Apologist by R.E.M.

Where You'll Find Me Now by Neutral Milk Hotel

Suedehead by Morrissey

Jealous Guy by John Lennon

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on July 30, 2017:

Shawn - Thanks for the suggestion! I've added it at #39. Much appreciated.

Shawn on July 30, 2017:

Eddie Money-walk on water

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 16, 2017:

Gin M. Court - Thank you for your quote. Have a lovely weekent.

Gin M. Court on June 16, 2017:

I vow to commit the best and worst to memory.

Then I will be able to choose better times,

knowing the path to take.

Practicing to always shine on!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 04, 2017:

Fabio - How sad and honest. Thank you for sharing your story. I hope others learn from your experience and decide not to hold back what they feel.

Fábio Rafael Teixeira Pereira on January 03, 2017:

I regret not showing that one girl how much I love her when I had the chance. I lost her, and it was all my fault, I know I didn't try hard enough to give her the attention and affection she deserved. I'm sorry Joana, amo-te.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 08, 2016:

L. - You certainly poured your heart out. It's obvious that you have learned a lot about yourself and others over the last 18 months or so. During this time, you and your friend have grown in different ways, grown apart. People do that. Perhaps she is not the angel you thought she is, just as you are not the demon you believe she portrays you to be. She may have quite a few issues of her own. She's also accustomed to playing a certain role in your old relationship; you both are and you both have changed. Give yourself permission to get to know one another again.

With over 7 billion people in the world, this is not the only person who can be your friend. Give her and others space, and branch out a little. Look forward to what you seek to become rather than looking back to who you were. Consider what you are interested in, whether hobbies, sports, educational endeavors, career or vocational interests, volunteer opportunities, your faith/philosophy/politics. Join groups or volunteer in order to widen your social circle. Take classes if that's what strikes your fancy. Practice meeting new and different types of people. When you feel more satisfied with yourself and who you are, you will begin attracting other people as friends. You can always check back with your old friend periodically to see where she is emotionally.

Hope this helps. Thanks for sharing your story.

L. on November 08, 2016:

Ok third take!! So as I was saying...

I think this is a great article and I am glad I came across it. Chicago, Adele, Elton John, Chapin, and Cher are some of my all-time favourites. In fact, "If I Could Turn Back Time" is one of the songs on the 'playlist of my life'. I spend entirely too much time obesessing over the past and im aware of that, but its hard not to when my present is so horrible and all the greatest moments of my life were in the past. Also, my past is where I made those horrible mistakes (and horrible things were done to me by fate, it seems)...all of which has led me here to this incredibly dismal present where I am virtually friendless and more alone than ever, and it really just keeps getting worse. What I want more than anything is just to go back in time and 1. relive all of my amazing memories and 2. stop myself from doing the regrettable things I did/try my best to not let the forces of life control me, so that I wont end up where I am now, and my present can be just as great as my past. But of course I know thats (currently) not possible, so for the last year or so ive been trying so hard to make amends with everyone that is so precious to me, but it seems like everyone's forgotten how to forgive.

You invited us to post our greatest moments of regret, so here's mine:

For a very long time I'd been BESTEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLD with someone who was so good, so saintly, she was like an angel on earth. I dont even think Mother Theresa fully compares, just for perspective. She was the one thing that gave me hope for all of humanity. I called her 'my one miracle'. So long story short, we were best friends for a really long time and everything was great, until the last couple years of high school, when I was having a really hard time even getting through a single day, let alone an entire school year. I started heavily depending on my friend to do things for me because I was incapable of doing them without all of my thousands of mental issues taking over and throwing me into the depths of despair. So she did them of course, because she was so selfless. Even though I really needed help and I know I wouldnt have made it through high school without her, it was still wrong to take advantage of her kindness, and I fully acknowledged that to her. She and I did have some disputes, but we were able to resolve them pretty well, and we started the summer still intending to follow through with our plan of working and saving up money for two years to move cross country and start our careers. Then the most unexpected thing happened. I went to a friend's house, came back home, and proceeded to have a complete mental breakdown. It was so bad I had to call all my friends and tell them I needed to take a hiatus from my life because I couldnt deal with anything anymore. I still think that was the right thing to do in order to restore any semblance of sanity (which it thankfully did) but after a year and a half, when I was finally able to talk to her again, we got off on a rocky start because she felt abandoned, which I can understand, even though she knew and truly understood the situation. I had taken all that time to work on bettering myself so that I could be the person I wanted to be, and be the best friend she deserved. It seemed like we were ultimately going to be able to work it out, but I kept sensing there was something odd about her behavior towards me, so when I finally confronted her about it, I realized that she had created a really bad stigma around me, which granted, wasnt unfounded, but in that time apart she had finally developed a healthy self-esteem, and she was much more confident and assertive, and she had now come to associate me with that meek, submissive, self-depracating person she used to be and wanted so desperately to stop being. Well, she got her wish, and I was so truly happy for her, but it seemed like in this new version of her there was no room for me, because she had demonized me somewhere so profoundly in her primal subconscious that even her rational understanding of the fact that I had drastically changed for the better and even swore on my life I'd never hurt her again werent able to shake the feeling of dread she now associated with me. I apologized and begged for forgiveness until my words became lost in my tortured sobs, but it was like that part of her was completely gone. It was like she had gained new self-confidence but had forgotten the virtue of forgiveness. I know I messed up really bad, but I dont know, I guess I just feel like everyone deserves a second chance. Especially someone who cares so much about her and has worked really hard to be a better friend for her. But she never gave me that second chance. And she was my last and only friend. And now im miserable and friendless with a bunch more problems and no one to share my life with anymore. I dont make friends easily and I dont want to. My friends were very few in number but they were perfect; it was me who had all the problems and I finally worked them all out with myself just in time to realize they had finished with me and didnt care about me anymore. All my amazing, out-of-this-world lifelong friendships are now over. A couple were my fault, others werent. Pretty ironic thing to happen to someone who values and cherishes true friendship above all else. I guess you cant make even one mistake. So as far as things that were my fault, what I regret most is spending that year and a half apart from my best friend. If I had tried to remain in contact with her maybe she wouldnt have developed that villainous image of me and we'd still be friends. Even more so, I wish I had never taken advantage of her back in high school in the first place, and not just because it would come back to haunt me, but because I love her more than anything I would never ever want to hurt her...and it hurts me deeply to know that I did.

So a lesson that comes to mind is: if you know youre going to be sorry about it later, dont do it in the first place. Words I try to live by every day on my path to becoming a better person.

Unfortunately, its not always that simple. I know.

Also, another concept I find important to note: sometimes, recognizing you did wrong and apologizing profusely isnt enough. The other person must find it within themselves to be able to forgive you, if not for you, then at least for themselves. And it cant be forced. So I'll be perpetually waiting I guess. The alternative option is just too harsh to bear.

Wow okay sorry that was so much. Its just that this article really resonated with me, so thank you for that Lady Flourish :)

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 08, 2016:

L. - Thank you for your kind comment. I am humbled by your kind words.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 05, 2016:

Rita, Although it's unfortunate that you have to struggle to get the help you need, I salute you for pressing on. You know you are too important to give up on. Depression is often referred to as the "common cold" in the mental health community -- not to make it seem less important but because it happens so frequently and there's a journey back. Depression and anxiety often go hand in hand. Persist in talking out your feelings with helpful people you know and trust until your parent authorizes the assistance that you seek. And look for ways to treat yourself kindly and look forward to your future. There are so many good things in this world. Although maybe they don't always show themselves now, you'll one day want to enjoy them. Best wishes to you.

Only a shadow on November 03, 2016:

I've talked to mum a bit more, she has agreed to take me to the doctors 'soon', she has promised and i know she never goes back on her word.

I've done lots for research to understand depression & anxiety more.

Thanks for listening {and helping}. i really appreciate people like you:)

~ Rita (Australian)

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 24, 2016:

Only a shadow - You did the right thing by sharing the information with your parent. Concentrate on keeping yourself healthy and positive. Focus on the future. And don't give up.

Only a shadow on October 24, 2016:

We spoke to mum (the adult friend & I), mum took it better then i thought she would. however she believe i don't have to see a doctor or psychologist. I'm gonna keep trying to get her to take me, but she says "They wont magically fix you" and i know that, but they might be able to help.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 14, 2016:

Rita - I wish you well.

Only a shadow on October 14, 2016:

I've asked a Adult friend of mine to help me tell my mum. she is gonna come over sometime next week. I hope this works *fingers crossed*. i need help and i can only get it if mum understands what i'm going through.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 01, 2016:

Rita, Please make telling your parents and getting help a priority. Make you, your health, and your future an urgent priority even though this is uncomfortable and difficult. Give the people who love you and brought you into this world a chance to get you the help you need. Don't let them feel regret and sorrow that they didn't know. Don't let them play the coulda woulda shoulda game for the rest of their lives.

If this isn't possible, then reach out to emergency services in a crisis or to a crisis intervention helpline. Or talk to your school guidance counselor. Keep talking to responsible adults you trust until you get the medical/psychological intervention you absolutely need. You are too important to delay this or drop it. Relying on friends who may also be in the same boat is not the answer.

I have a firm sense that you are not American-based but rather from Australia or the UK (just guessing) and I don't know what the resources are there.

You cannot continue to cut and to feel worthless and dejected. The world needs you, however imperfect that may be, and all your gifts and talents. It's very possible that you have a biochemical imbalance so stop blaming yourself, sweet girl. Love yourself and take the important step of getting the help you need. You are in my thoughts.

Only a shadow on October 01, 2016:

Though i have never met you, your words are so nice to hear. thank you for taking the time to respond:)

i guess i try to help others because i feel i have lost in helping myself..

i worry so much about others because I want others to be happy first, that's what I've always done, put others first. I know to a degree that's good but on the whole i need to look out for myself first. I spend most of my day, replying to people who are down, who are like me, but in the end your right i need to put myself first and work on getting my life back on track, not pushing it into second place.

my closest friend, she tries so hard to help me. Today she cried in front of me for the first time cause she said she felt like she was failing. i felt so bad like I've let her down, i keep telling her she hasn't failed, that she has been helping, that i didn't know what i would do without her. i hated seeing her cry, she never cries.she's one of the few things/people that keep me going.. i wish i never relapsed and i wish i didn't think of suicide almost everyday...

i shall try -soon- to talk to my parents about my depression and anxiety, but i just can't bring myself to tell them about me self-harming, till i know how they respond to me saying that i think i have depression and anxiety. does that make sense??

I've told a trusted adult already, and she said she's gonna help me tell my parents about my depression & anxiety. i feel better with a trusted adult -also a close friend of mum's - there, helping me tell my mum.

having a friend die by suicide i think is one of the hardest things, you feel useless, like you didn't do enough, i rather go my whole life without music then have another friend die by suicide! i guess..then since i know how much it hurts, i don't want to kill myself because i don't want my friends & family to feel that way. which makes me even more depressed cause i really just want to end it all, but i hate causing people pain. i guess that, that's a good thing, it's stopping me. {for now at least}

i'm tired of being strong to help others or so others wont be upset because of me showing another side of me, a darker side.

you might not know how much your replies help me, they make me smile a bit more, i really appreciate the time you take to reply.

i shall try to get help,to stop cutting, refusing to eat, to tell my mum, to maybe even see a doctor/therapist. sure this won't happen all in next month, but it will happen.

From today i shall start taking more care of myself, and try to focus more on helping myself.

also call me 'Rita'.

I'll try to be strong.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 26, 2016:

Only a shadow - You sound like a sensitive and trustworthy person, a giver, who could use some support developing some psychological boundaries so that other people's issues -- their problems and worries -- don't drag you down along with them. Friends who are cutting, wanting to die by suicide, and running away are major issues that you're tackling. While it's important to intervene in other people's emergency situations, leave the ongoing stuff for a professional for your own health and the best overall outcome. This is especially the case since you have attempted to die by suicide yourself, as this makes you especially vulnerable. Take care of you first. You have primary responsibility to yourself. Try to talk with your parents or another adult for perspective (teacher you trust, coach). The teenage years can be brutal but there is a life beyond. I promise.

In order to be healthy and to flourish yourself, you may find it helpful to talk to a professional counselor you can trust. As a teenager, I had a male friend who died by suicide and it took me years to feel normal and whole again. However, I was able to learn new communication strategies and found that education was my ticket out of an environment that was not good for me. I hope you find solace. My heart goes out to you. Be strong and healthy.

Only a shadow on September 25, 2016:

FlourishAnyway ~I would like to thank you for responding to my post. I am but a teen, and it hurts because though i am not even close to twenty i have experienced so much, even stuff my parents haven't. and they find it hard to help and they don't know what to say.

I try to help as many people as i can, I find by helping others, and listening to them, helps me.

I am trying to forgive myself, and i am getting better.

(In my short life i've, had 4 close friends die, i've attempted suicide once, had 18people betray me. helped 3 friends stop cutting, helped 2 not commit suicide, listened to 27 people telling me their problems and worries, stopped 2 friends from running away from home. and many more the list could go on for a long time)

yes i've had lots of people betray me, but you know how many of them actually said 'i'm sorry'.....1..just one.

I can't trust people anymore. why? because people don't apologize anymore, because people don't care how their actions affect others.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 25, 2016:

Only a shadow - You cannot apologize to your friend because they are gone now, but I hope you forgive yourself as a part of healing. Thank you for sharing your story. I think it will help others.

Only a shadow on September 25, 2016:

All these songs and really great. some though make me cry because they remind me too much of the people who never apologized. some people care more about their pride, their ego then about their friendship with others.

If you have wronged a person, apologize. just say the words, "I'm sorry", thats all i want to hear.

Sure i did once no apologize for something, i once didn't say sorry. and now...its too late to apologize, even though i really want to i can't, she's gone. completely.

Don't make the same mistake i did, apologize before it's too late, i lost my bestfriend because of my pride, and i can't go back and fix it.

Now i apologize as soon as i can. don't wait till it's too late, till you can't go back.

Because the feeling of regret never leaves, it will haunt you and crush you and make you blame yourself for the rest of your life.

Don't make the same mistake as i did.

Apologize.

Say, "I'm sorry"

Before it's too late...

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on March 20, 2016:

Peggy - Thanks for stopping by! I appreciate the visit. Have a terrific weekend!

Peggy Woods from Houston, Texas on March 19, 2016:

You surely came up with a long list of songs for this subject. I know some of them but not others. I'll have to spend some time listening to them. Thanks!

Subhas from New Delhi, India on March 02, 2016:

It is always soothe our own heart more than anyone else's by at least whispering the word sorry into the ears and if it could be done with the help of a song than nothing is better than this. Thumbs up for sharing all these.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 14, 2016:

Shyron - I like Martina McBride too! Thank you for stopping by and the suggestion.

Shyron E Shenko from Texas on February 13, 2016:

I was just listening to a CD and heard another song you may like to add to this list. it is by Martina McBride - I Still Miss Someone.

Have a blessed weekend.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 12, 2016:

Jo - Thank you for stopping by, and I'm glad you enjoyed it! Hope you are doing well. Enjoy your weekend!

Jo Miller from Tennessee on February 10, 2016:

"Always On My Mind" immediately popped in my head when I saw this list. Love that song.

Great list!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 10, 2016:

rajan - I agree. The relationship, if you value it, needs to come first. Sorry is so hard to say for some.

Rajan Singh Jolly from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar, INDIA. on February 09, 2016:

A wonderful compilation. Saying sorry is probably the hardest of things but as the quote by Mark Mathews sums up it's all about valuing one's relationship over one's ego. Great quotes as well.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 08, 2016:

Ann - I like that someone tried to use a song to help apologize to you. Not everyone is good with words, and sometimes songs can help grease the wheels. Thanks for your comment!

Ann Carr from SW England on February 08, 2016:

I love 'Always on my mind' and 'If I could turn back time' - the latter has been used to say sorry to me!

Great songs; again, there are many I didn't know. I believe one should say sorry if we truly mean it; it can heal a little but not always completely.

Ann

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 07, 2016:

Peg - Thanks for stopping by. I hope you are well. Chicago is one of my old favorites. Have a great week!

Peg Cole from Northeast of Dallas, Texas on February 05, 2016:

What a treasure to find this list of valuable and useful songs. I watched the wonderful video from Chicago and never realized they were so handsome. I guess I could forgive any one of them. Hahaha. On a serious note, saying I'm sorry is tough and yet so necessary from time to time. Great advice. Great songs.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 04, 2016:

poetryman6969 - No one can make someone feel sorry and some people prefer to look forward rather than back. Thanks for stopping by!

poetryman6969 on February 03, 2016:

Even though it does not fit in with your theme, these songs and the idea of them remind of the lyrics:

"You have no right to ask me how I feel".

Sometimes the regret and apologetic attitude backfires.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 30, 2016:

Shyron - This is a great addition! Thank you. Totally missed that one. Adding it. Have a great weekend!

Shyron E Shenko from Texas on January 30, 2016:

Flourish, here I sit with the tears rolling down my face, all the songs I use to sing along with, that I loved listening to, Brenda Lee was a special with I'm Sorry.

I'm sorry, I did not see Connie Francis on your list, with

Who's Sorry Now

Connie Francis

Who's sorry now

Who's sorry now

Who's heart is aching for breaking each vow

Who's sad and blue

Who's crying too

Just like I cried over you

Flourish these songs will be playing in my head all night.

Blessings and Hugs my dear friend.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 30, 2016:

Larry - Thanks for the support. Have a great weekend!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 30, 2016:

Genna - Thanks so much for your kind words of support. Elton John is one of my favorites, and he's even better in concert! Have a great weekend!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 30, 2016:

Sha - How right you are! Hope you are well. Have a great weekend!

Genna East from Massachusetts, USA on January 30, 2016:

What a terrific hub! I'm loving this. Elton John and Harry Chapin are my favorites in this amazing, comprehensive collection of music and poetry. Thank you for this gift. :-)

Shauna L Bowling from Central Florida on January 30, 2016:

These are all great songs. Sadly, our mouths are the most volatile weapons we possess. Words can hurt and can't be taken back. We may forgive, but can never forget. We should take care to think before we speak.

Larry Rankin from Oklahoma on January 29, 2016:

Long time no see. Wonderful as always.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 27, 2016:

Linda - Yes, it sure is. Thanks for stopping by and for always being so supportive. I hope you are staying warm this winter!

Linda Crampton from British Columbia, Canada on January 26, 2016:

Thanks for sharing another great playlist as well as the important information about apologies, Flourish. The story that starts this hub is very sad.

Shadrack2 on January 25, 2016:

Great songs indeed. I would like to purchase some of them.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 25, 2016:

agusfanani - It's interesting to me which American songs friends in other countries have heard of before. Thanks for sharing that. I hope you are well and have a lovely week ahead.

agusfanani from Indonesia on January 25, 2016:

An awesome list of songs about sorry and apology. I'm familiar the ones "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" by Chicago and I Still Believe In You" by Vince Gill and played those songs often because of their nice melody and match the generation I belong to.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 25, 2016:

Savvy daring - Wouldn't it be great to know where a person stood on that long before you married them? I worry about people who rush into things for exactly this type of reason. Some people never apologize, no way, no how.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 25, 2016:

MsDora - No matter the age many human mistakes repeat themselves so thankfully apologies can help heal the divides. The trick is taking that first step and expressing contrition. Thanks for being so supportive. Have a wonderful week.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on January 25, 2016:

Heard Willie Nelson's "Always on My Mind" playing on the department's store intercom today. I like the mix of old and new on your list. People in every decade have made the same mistakes and have had to say the same word--sorry. This is really good work.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 25, 2016:

CarbDiva - Thank you for your kind kudos. Stay warm and have a great week!

Yves on January 25, 2016:

I love "Always On My Mind" even though it's a lame excuse for being inattentive. The song still gets me right here (in the heart). As for P.G.'s quote that "it's a good idea never to apologize....." Huh? On what planet! Maybe in hell, I guess.

Great list, Flourish. I happen to like "I'm sorry songs."

Linda Lum from Washington State, USA on January 25, 2016:

Flourish - As soon as I saw the title (1) I smiled because I have been looking forward to your next compilation--you are great at doing these--and (2) I could hear Brenda Lee singing. Thanks for another great list.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 25, 2016:

Swalia - Thank you for reading. Have a wonderful week!

Shaloo Walia from India on January 25, 2016:

A great compilation! 'Please forgive me' is one of my favorite songs and makes me cry whenever I listen to it.