Updated date:

176 Songs About Sorrow, Grief, and Lost Loved Ones

FlourishAnyway believes there is a playlist for just about any situation and is on a mission to unite and entertain the world through song.

If you're mourning the loss of a friend or loved one, make a playlist of pop, rock, and country songs about grief.  Take comfort in knowing you are not alone.

If you're mourning the loss of a friend or loved one, make a playlist of pop, rock, and country songs about grief. Take comfort in knowing you are not alone.

Mourning Someone Special: Healing and Peace Through Music

Grief is like an unwelcome stranger who invites himself into your life and often stays too long. He sets his own pace, cannot be hurried along. You must suffer his poor company until Acceptance arrives to replace him.

If you're reading this because you've lost someone special to you, I am sorry for your loss. Know that you are not alone. During the times when I have lost people close to me, I have often found solace in music. Songs connect us to others who have experienced the same feelings. They spark memories of lost loved ones and creatively distract from the pain of the moment while expressing hope in tomorrow.

Make yourself a playlist to soothe your sorrow. These pop, rock, and country songs express the mix of emotions involved in mourning the loss of a dear friend or relative. I hope they help bring you healing and peace.

1. "See You Again" by Carrie Underwood

Although sad that her loved one has passed away, the narrator in this power ballad from 2013 finds strength in knowing that they will someday reunite in the everafter. Until then, she carries their memory with her, finding hope and comfort in an eventual reunion.

2. "Supermarket Flowers" by Ed Sheeran

Although this touching 2017 pop song describes the aftermath of a mother's death from the perspective of her adult son, Ed Sheeran actually based it upon the death of his beloved grandmother.

The narrator gathers her get well cards, stuffed animals, supermarket flowers, and other items that well wishers had showered upon the woman in her waning days. He folds her nightgowns, tidies up the space she used to inhabit, and talks lovingly to her spirit:

So, I'll sing Hallelujah
You were an angel in the shape of my mum
When I fell down you'd be there holding me up
Spread your wings as you go, when God takes you back
He'll say, "Hallelujah, you're home."

3. "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day

The death of a friend or loved one can sit with you like a dark cloud for months or much longer. As you wait for the sadness to lift, you may feel the need to simply retreat from the world through sleep.

The frontman of Green Day wrote this 2005 rock song about the death of his father from cancer when the singer was a child. The song has also become symbolic of the loss that people experienced with the September 11 attack and with Hurricane Katrina.

4. "Everybody Hurts" by R.E.M.

Having experienced loss, you may sometimes feel like giving up. This 1992 rock song empathizes with your pain and grief, encouraging you to hang on. It emphasizes that tragedy is a common part of the human experience, and you are not alone in your suffering.

5. "Who You'd Be Today" by Kenny Chesney

There are few things more tragic as a person who has died before their time. Dying young seems to violate the natural order of our universe.

The narrator in this 2005 country tune laments his loved one's death. Concentrating on their unrealized potential and all of the good things they never got to experience, he wonders what their life would look like if it hadn't been cut short:

It ain't fair; you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you.

6. "Hurt" by Christina Aguilera

Written in honor of the songwriter's late father, this 2006 pop song expresses the protagonist's regret that she wasn't forgiving of mistakes when he was alive. Rather than try to bridge the divide between them, she used blame and rejection.

Although she seeks reconciliation, now it's too late to make it right. She realizes that her choices have only hurt herself.

7. "Holes in the Floor of Heaven" by Steve Wariner

The man in this tender 1998 country song recounts the story of losing his grandmother when he was a child and his young wife as an adult. The thread that connects both sad events is the belief that his loved ones are in heaven watching over him, wishing that they could be together.

8. "When I'm Gone" by Joey + Rory

There is such heartbreaking irony in this 2012 country song which takes the perspective of a dying woman addressing her lover. She tenderly reassures him that although they will miss one another after she passes away, he will find the strength to endure without her and be okay.

In a tragic twist of fate, Joey Feek (the female half of this husband/wife country music duo) was diagnosed with stage four cervical cancer in 2014, just four months after giving birth to the couple's daughter. She died in 2016 at age 40, and her husband subsequently retired from singing and writing music.

9. "Dancing in the Sky" by Dani and Lizzy

Do yourself a favor by listening to this heartrending pop song. In 2016, these twin sisters from Canada became a viral sensation after posting this song on Facebook and YouTube. One of the girls (Lizzy) wrote it to honor a deceased friend.

Filled with bittersweet longing as well as hope, the song features a grieving narrator who asks her loved one what heaven is like and whether the fear and pain has subsided.

"It takes strength to make your way through grief, to grab hold of life and let it pull you forward." - Patti Davis, daughter of Pres. Ronald Reagan

"It takes strength to make your way through grief, to grab hold of life and let it pull you forward." - Patti Davis, daughter of Pres. Ronald Reagan

10. "Where Were You (When the World Stopped Turning)" by Alan Jackson

Where were on that fateful day, September 11, 2001? How did you react? I was with my toddler as she watched Barney cartoons, both of us unaware of the events unfolding until my husband called. I changed the channel and saw the devastation. For months, my little girl uttered, "Castles fell," referring to the skyscrapers. And even she wanted to know why.

This Grammy Award-winning country song from 2002 explores a variety of responses that people had as well as where they were when they found out that the world had been changed forever.

11. "There You'll Be" by Faith Hill

Thinking back on her relationship with a loved one who is now gone, the woman in this 2001 country song considers herself blessed. She reflects on what he taught her and how she will always carry him with her in her heart.

12. "A Long December" by Counting Crows

The anniversary of a death or other tragic event in one's life can spark sad memories, and that's what this 1996 rock song is about. The friend of one of the songwriters was run over by a car one December, and he spent several stressful weeks visiting her in the hospital as she recuperated. It felt like a blur, and when the next December rolled around, the feelings of sadness and loss came rolling back to him. He hopes that this year will be better than the last.

24 Ways to Honor the Memory of a Loved One

Share ways that you keep your lost loved one's memory alive in the Comment Section below.

make a playlist of their favorite music or music that reminds you of them

organize a fundraising drive for their favorite cause

make sure their pet(s) are loved and well-cared for

turn their favorite clothes into a memory quilt or teddy bear

plant a tree, a rose bush, or a memorial garden

wear something as a reminder of them (e.g., their jewelry, tie, watch)

dedicate a bench in your local park to them

start a scholarship or hold an essay contest in their name

create or commission a piece of art or make a collage

reach out to someone else who is grieving or alone

share favorite photos and memories about them with others who loved them, too

write a letter to them to express anything that was unsaid

do something your loved one would have enjoyed but never got to do

feed the birds (and the squirrels)

turn some of their ashes into cremation jewelry

adopt a stretch of highway and pick up litter in their name

educate others about the disease or other cause of death (e.g., cancer, texting and driving)

write a poem

finish that big project they were working on

donate your loved one's favorite books to the local library, school, GED program, or other charity

make the recipes that your loved one was famous for

distribute forget-me-nots or wildflowers to others far and wide and ask that they plant them in your loved one's name

light a candle and reflect on the good times you shared

take care of yourself because that's what they'd want

13. "Heaven Was Needing a Hero" by Jo Dee Messina

The protagonist in this 2010 country song reminiscences about the last time she saw her now-deceased loved one, wishing she could have held on longer. Looking to make sense of their death, she concludes that heaven needed a hero.

Usher Sings "Gone Too Soon" at Michael Jackson's Funeral

14. "Gone Too Soon" by Michael Jackson

This simple but poetic pop ballad from 1993 was written by Michael Jackson as a tribute to Ryan White, an Indiana teenager who was expelled from school for having contracted HIV through a tainted blood transfusion. The song draws a number of comparisons to short-lasting wonders such as rainbows and comets.

Later, it was also sung in memory of Princess Diana in 1997 and by Usher in 2009 at the funeral of Michael Jackson.

"Grief is the price we pay for love." - Queen Elizabeth II

"Grief is the price we pay for love." - Queen Elizabeth II

15. "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion

As the theme song to the Titanic, this 1997 pop song expresses both sadness and resilience in the face of loss. The protagonist has been touched deeply by love, but his life has been cut short. She pledges to honor the memory of both her lover and their relationship by carrying on with her life.

16. "Fire and Rain" by James Taylor

This sorrowful song from 1970 was written after the death of James Taylor's childhood friend whose death was kept secret from him by others because they believed it would distract him from his career. It also describes his struggles with drug addiction and fame.

The classic song expresses his reflections on these crises:

I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again.

17. "See You Again" by Wiz Khalifa (featuring Charlie Puth)

The narrator in this 2015 pop song reflects on his friendship with someone close to him who has died, and he hopes that they are in a better place. He recalls the good times they shared and looks forward to one day reuniting with him.

"There is no grief like the grief that does not speak." - Henry Wadsorth Longfellow, American poet

"There is no grief like the grief that does not speak." - Henry Wadsorth Longfellow, American poet

18. "The Greatest Man I Never Knew" by Reba McEntire

If you have a stoic father, then this 1992 country song will really register emotionally. This song is one of regret as well as mourning.

The narrator describes growing up with a father who buried himself in his work. Although he loved her, he couldn't find the words to express it, and he rarely hugged her. They grew apart over the years until he died, and she learned too late that he thought the world of her.

19. "One More Day" by Diamond Rio

Dreaming that he could wish for anything, the narrator in this 2000 country number wouldn't wish for riches but instead one more day with the person he has lost. He imagines how he would spend that precious time together. Make sure you say everything you need to say to those you love so that you don't look back in regret.

"Tears are the silent language of grief." - Voltaire, French philosopher

"Tears are the silent language of grief." - Voltaire, French philosopher

20. "Not a Day Goes By" by Lonestar

In this heartfelt country song from 2001, the narrator mourns the loss of someone important to him. We don't know whether she's gone due to a break-up or death, but he misses her fiercely.

He carries a picture of her around in his heart, and her memory is still seared into his soul. On the outside he tries to convey that he's doing fine, but inside it's a different story.

"When grief is deepest, words are fewest." - Ann Voskamp, Canadian writer

"When grief is deepest, words are fewest." - Ann Voskamp, Canadian writer

Even More Songs About Sorrow, Grief, and Lost Loved Ones

Do you know a song about grief, sorrow, and loss that should be on this playlist? Leave us a suggestion in the Comments Section below.

SongArtistYear Released

21. The Dance

Garth Brooks

1990

22. Sissy's Song

Alan Jackson

2009

23. Tears in Heaven

Eric Clapton

1992

24. You Should Be Here

Cole Swindell

2016

25. If I Had Only Known

Reba McEntire

1991

26. Will the Circle Be Unbroken

Nitty Gritty Dirt Band

1972

27. Let It Be

The Beatles

1970

28. Homesick

MercyMe

2004

29. Please Remember

LeAnn Rimes

2000

30. Dance with My Father

Luther Vandross

2003

31. Paradise

Coldplay

2011

32. I'll See You Again

Westlife

2009

33. Gone Too Soon

Daughtry

2011

34. Fly

Celine Dion

1996

35. Heaven Got Another Angel

Gordon Garner

2010

36. In the Arms of an Angel

Sarah McLachlan

1997

37. Small Bump

Ed Sheeran

2011

38. Why

Rascal Flatts

2009

39. Save a Place for Me

Matthew West

2007

40. Bridge Over Troubled Water

Simon & Garfunkel

1970

41. I'll Be Missing You

Puff Daddy (featuring Faith Evans & 112)

1997

42. In My Life (I Love You More)

The Beatles

1965

43. Don't Take the Girl

Tim McGraw

1994

44. Like Jesus to a Child

George Michaels

1996

45. How Can I Help You Say Goodbye

Patty Loveless

1993

46. Radios in Heaven

Plain White T's

2002

47. Life Without You

Stevie Ray Vaughan

1999

48. Love Is Stronger Than Death

The The

1993

49. Love, Me

Collin Raye

1991

50. If You're Reading This

Tim McGraw

2007

51. He Stopped Loving Her Today

George Jones

1980

52. Even in Death

Evanesence

2000

53. I'll Wait for You

Joe Nichols

2005

54. To Where You Are

Josh Groban

2002

55. If You Came Back From Heaven

Lorrie Morgan

1994

56. Temporary Home

Carrie Underwood

2009

57. Hear You Me

Jimmy Eats World

2001

58. You Were Loved

Whitney Houston

1996

59. Waiting on Sunshine

Amy Rose

2013

60. You Have Been Loved

George Michael

1996

61. I Drive Your Truck

Lee Brice

2012

62. One Sweet Day

Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men

1995

63. If Heaven Wasn't So Far Away

Justin Moore

2011

64. Over You

Miranda Lambert

2011

65. Drink a Beer

Luke Bryan

2013

66. I'm Not Gonna Miss You

Glen Campbell and The Wrecking Crew

2014

67. Honey (I Miss You)

Bobby Goldsboro

1968

68. Here Today

Paul McCartney

1982

69. You're Still Here

Faith Hill

2002

70. Nobody Knows It But Me

Tony Rich Project

1995

71. A Picture of Me (Without You)

Lorrie Morgan

1991

72. Wish You Were Here

Mark Wills

1998

73. The Car

Jeff Carson

1995

74. Miss Emily's Picture

John Conlee

1981

75. Probably Wouldn't Be This Way

LeAnn Rimes

2005

76. Jealous of the Angels

Donna Taggart

2012

77. In Loving Memory

Alter Bridge

2004

78. Cryin' for Me (Wayman's Song)

Toby Keith

2009

79. Angel Flying Too Close to the Ground

Willie Nelson

1980

80. Who Knew

Pink

2006

81. Wish You Were Here

Incubus

2004

82. Joanne

Lady Gaga

2016

83. Sinner

Andy Grammer

2014

84. Promise to Try

Madonna

1989

85. How Could You Leave Us?

NF

2016

86. I Miss My Friend

Darryl Worrley

2002

87. The Baby

Blake Shelton

2003

88. Closer to the Light

Bruce Cockburn

1994

89. See You On the Other Side

Ozzy Osbourne

1995

90. When I Get Where I'm Going

Brad Paisley

2005

91. Just Like Them Horses

Reba McEntire

2015

92. Last Kiss

Pearl Jam

2000

93. Ordinary World

Duran Duran

1993

94. Ronan

Taylor Swift

2012

95. If I Get High Enough

Nothing but Thieves

2015

96. Into the Light

In This Moment

2014

97. My Father's Eyes

Eric Clapton

1998

98. I Lived

OneRepublic

2014

99. Nighingale

Demi Lovato

2013

100. My Immortal

Evanescence

2003

101. Roses for the Dead

Funeral for a Friend

2006

102. Blackbird

Alter Bridge

2007

103. In Loving Memory

Alter Bridge

2004

104. Heaven

Beyonce

2013

105.Safe & Sound

Taylor Swift ft. The Civil Wars

2012

106. Go Rest High on That Mountain

Vince Gill

1994

107. Slipped Away

Avril Lavigne

2004

108. My Angel

Kellie Pickler

2006

109. Bye Bye

Mariah Carey

2008

110. Lucy

Skillet

2009

111. Hold On

Chord Overstreet

2017

112. One More Light

Linkin Park

2017

113. Can You See Me

Krista Siegfrids

2013

114. Shadow of the Day

Linkin Park

2007

115. Clouds

Before You Exit

2016

116. If Heaven Had a Face

Joe Jury

2017

117. Looking for an Answer

Mike Shinoda/Linkin Park

2017

118. Lay Me Down

Sam Smith

2014

119. Saturn

Sleeping at Last

2016

120. So Far Away

Avenged Sevenfold

2010

121. I Grieve

Peter Gabriel

1998

122. Everybody Lost Somebody

Bleachers

2017

123. I Still Miss You

Keith Anderson

2008

124. Together Again

Janet Jackson

1997

125. Grace

Kate Kavenik

2005

126. Into the West

Annie Lennox

2003

127. El Paso

Marty Robbins

1959

128. You Said You’d Grow Old with Me

Michael Schulte

2012

129. This Is Your Song

Ronan Keating

2004

130. If You Could See Me Now

The Script

2012

131. If I Die Young

The Band Perry

2010

132. This Song Is for My Mother

Catman Cohen

2011

133. Father, You Believed

Catman Cohen

2005

134. Gone Away

The Offspring

1997

135. Address in the Stars

Caitlin & Will

2009

136. Leave Out All the Rest

Linkin Park

2007

137. Free Bird

Lynyrd Skyryrd

1973

138. Crash

Sum41

2011

139. Angel

The Corrs

2004

140. I'm Not Lisa

Jessi Colter

1975

141. Red Rag Top

Tim McGraw

2002

142. Save Our Last Goodbye

Disturbed

2015

143. Picture Perfect

Escape the Fate

2013

144. We're Gonna Ride Again

Brantley Gilbert

2017

145. One Hell of an Amen

Brantley Gilbert

2014

146. Only the Good Die Young

Billy Joel

1977

147. Forever & Always

Dylan Matthew

2018

148. Little Soldier

Trey Healy

2017

149. In My Dreams

James Morrison

2011

150. Gone Too Soon

Simple Plan

2011

151. Fade In/Fade Out

Nothing More

2017

152. It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday

Boyz II Men

1991

153. Wherever You Will You

The Calling

2001

154. If I Have to Go

Tom Waits

2006

155. The Wind

Mariah Carey

1991

156. Goodbye My Friend

Keali'i Riechel

2003

157. King of Sorrow

Sade

2001

158. Panama

Quinn XCII

2018

159. Home

Jeff Williams (featuring Casey Lee Williams)

2017

160. Cold

Jeff Williams (featuring Casey Lee Williams)

2016

161. Travelin' Soldier

Dixie Chicks

2002

162. Just a Dream

Carrie Underwood

2008

163. Emma

Hot Chocolate

1974

164. Rocky

Austin Roberts

1975

165. I Promise It's Not Goodbye

Chris Cornell

2009

166. Seasons in the Sun

Terry Jacks

1973

167. My Son

Gary Puckett & The Union Gap

1968

168. I Pray

Amanda Perez

2004

169. If Today Was Your Last Day

Nickelback

2008

170. Like a River Runs

Bleachers

2014

171. To Build a Home

The Cimematic Orchestra

2007

172. How to Save a Life

The Fray

2006

173. The End

Linkin Park

2001

174. Two of Us

Louis Tomlinson

2019

175. Dad's Old Number

Cole Swindell

2018

176. I Miss You

Miley Cyrus

2007

Questions & Answers

Question: My mom died two weeks ago at the age of 58. We lived together and took care of each other for 37 years. My boyfriend is getting frustrated. I was depressed before. I know I should be able to handle this. My grandmother yelled at me on the phone to get out of bed and be of some use to my daughter. But what do I tell people when they yell at me for being in bed for two weeks and tell me to snap out of it and get out of bed and take care of my daughter? What if I'm not ready?

Answer: Your mother just died two short weeks ago, and although your grandmother is grieving too (after all, she lost a daughter), it's insensitive and short-sighted for anyone to tell you to simply "snap out of it." It sounds like you want to able to take care of yourself and your daughter but just isn’t up to either right now. Your grandmother and boyfriend are probably concerned about the mental and physical well-being of your child on top of everything else. It sounds like you and your mother were especially close, and your mom probably assisted in practical areas of your life, including with daily childcare duties. Can you think of trusted relatives and friends of the family who might be able to help you out on a practical level while you’re struggling?

Grieving can be a lengthy process even for people who weren't experiencing depression before such a devastating loss. There is no set time limit for how long you "should" grieve or when you "should" be over a death. Having pre-existing depression, however, can complicate the grief process.

Contact the healthcare provider (i.e., psychologist, psychiatrist, licensed clinical social worker, or another counselor) who has treated you in the past for your depression and update them on recent developments in your life before your depression gets any worse with the upcoming Christmas holidays or before you reach a point that you can’t care for your daughter or yourself at all. If you’re not able to do this, then ask your grandmother or boyfriend to help make the appointment for you and get you there. If your reference is to undiagnosed depression and you have no prior mental healthcare provider, then contact your family doctor for a recommendation to a clinical psychologist or other counselor. DON’T WAIT.

Working with a mental healthcare provider, the family can take a look at your social support system and help you marshal the resources that you need to get through this most difficult time of your life. I’m sorry for your loss and hope that you’ll take action.

In case you need the following, I included crisis resource information:

If you are in crisis and feel like you may harm yourself, call 911 for immediate life-saving assistance. You may also contact one of the following resources for talk or text support:

1) National Hopeline Network 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433)

If you or someone you know are depressed and considering suicide, call the National Hopeline Network at 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433). Your call is free and confidential. Or chat live with a crisis volunteer at http://hopeline.com/.

2) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.TALK (8255)

Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to talk with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. Available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Note that the National Suicide Prevention website lists additional, special hotline numbers for Spanish speakers, people with hearing impairments and veterans in crisis, and people facing distress related to natural disasters: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/talk-to-some...

3) Crisis Text Line Number 741741

Finally, please be sure to access this terrific resource: http://beta.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevent... which describes action steps to take if you are feeling suicidal.

If you're in crisis and prefer to text rather than call, then here's a confidential crisis text line staffed nationally by trained counselors in suicide prevention. Text "HOME" to 741741 from anywhere in the United States.

Question: How long should you allow yourself to grieve before it's considered unhealthy?

Answer: Everyone’s grief is different, so please don’t put yourself on an artificial timetable. What takes one person several years may take another six months. Many factors influence grief including:

1) the nature of your relationship with the deceased (e.g., child, parent, friend) and the level of closeness between you

2) any key unresolved issues between you and the deceased

3) circumstances surrounding your loved one’s death

4) your age, personality, coping style, and your past experience with bereavement

5) your social support system

6) other losses you’ve recently experienced (e.g., several deaths in rapid succession, also losing your job or home in a compressed time frame).

Give yourself room to experience the loss of your loved one and make meaning of it by

1) talking with friends, relatives, and others in your support network. Talk about your loved one to remember them and make sense of their passing

2) accepting your feelings about their loss, including sadness, anger, regret, confusion, and weariness

3) maintaining your daily routine. Take care of both yourself and your family each day so that you keep moving forward. Eat healthy food, exercise regularly, and get plenty of sleep. Avoid alcohol and drugs.

4) reaching out to others in your support network to support them in how they are dealing with the mutual loss.

5) finding a special way to honor the memory of your deceased loved one.

There is no shame in asking for professional help, so don’t be afraid to consult a qualified counselor or psychologist if you feel you are having trouble coping with your loss. Some of the signs that you may need to seek a professional’s help include:

• You don’t start to feel any better as time passes.

• Inability to enjoy life

• Problems accepting the death

• Bitterness about your loss

• Preoccupation with your sorrow

• Feeling that life holds no meaning or purpose

• Extreme focus on the loss and reminders of the loved one

• Intense longing or pining for your deceased loved one

• You start to think about hurting yourself or others.

• You have ongoing trouble eating or sleeping (too much or too little).

• Your feelings begin to disrupt your daily life.

• You turn to drugs or alcohol for coping.

• Numbness or detachment

• Depression or deep sadness

• Trouble carrying out normal routines

• Withdrawing from social activities

• Irritability or agitation

• Lack of trust in others

Be easy on yourself and know that others care and can identify with your feelings of pain.

Question: What are some ways to handle anger problems and control them when you feel sad?

Answer: I assume that you have experienced a relationship loss, and for that I am sorry. It's natural to feel anger when you lose someone important in your life, whether through death, breakup or divorce, or physical separation, as in when one partner moves away.

Several ideas for constructively dealing with one's anger include:

1) practicing 7-7-7 relaxation breathing: inhale deeply for 7 seconds, hold it for 7 seconds, and exhale completely for 7 seconds; repeat

2) exercise, such as running, walking, yoga, basketball

3) talk it out with a friend or counselor

4) write about your feelings in a journal or do creative writing

5) change your environment/take a "timeout."

6) humor - watch funny movies or go to a comedy club

7) get plenty of sleep

8) listen to upbeat music such as this Positive Vibe Playlist: Happy and Uplifting Songs to Put You in a Good Mood. https://spinditty.com/playlists/Feel-Great-Playlis...

Question: My mother died when I was five, and I am now fourteen. I still find it hard to deal with, but don’t want to tell my family about it. Do you have any tips?

Answer: Your mom would be with you if she could, my young friend. I'm sorry about the loss of your mother.

Please don't continue to push this important issue down and not speak about "the elephant in the room." Instead, find a way to talk about your grief with your family because it's likely that you have questions about your mother's life and/or her passing. Or, you may want to share memories or see photos, or talk about how her absence makes an impact on your life emotionally and practically.

Here's how you might start the conversation:

1) Approach your father, guardian, or a grandparent who is a good listener. It's best if you have some privacy so you can be open.

2) Select a relaxed time when things are going well, and you're chatting about other issues. It's better NOT to mix it with arguments or when there's time pressure, and there isn't time to have the conversation. You need a relaxed, unrushed conversation, if possible.

3) Say something along the lines of, "Can I talk to you about something? I still miss Mom, and I find it hard to deal with sometimes."

Don't overthink this. You won't get it perfect so just do it. It may be a good thing ahead of time if you think about what you want out of the conversation. That will help you communicate your needs. Listen to your relative's grief, too. You have something in common.

Ideally, this should be an ongoing conversation. It is possible to include the memory of a lost loved one in your life and talk about them in daily life in a healthy way. Some people find that a psychologist or family counselor is helpful in processing grief, especially if it is creating difficulties in their lives.

I wish you the best in addressing this with your family and with everything in your life. Please check back with us and update us at a later time to let us know how you're doing. You can leave a comment in the Comments Section of the playlist of Songs About Sorrow, Grief, and Lost Loved Ones.

Question: How am I supposed to move on with my life when everyone tells me that but I don't want to move on?

Answer: People grieve at different rates and in different ways, so they may be trying to rush you along in your grief if it's been only a short time after your loved one's passing. However, if you feel that the loss of your loved one has started to take over your life and become so prolonged that you're not healing with time, you may be experiencing "complicated grief" and need to see a therapist. This is particularly so if your grief symptoms interfere with your everyday life after a year of your loss.

Signs of complicated grief can include:

• Intense sorrow, pain, and persistent thoughts about your loved one’s death

• Problems accepting the death

• Emotional numbness or detachment

• Bitterness about your loss

• Feelings that life holds little purpose

• Inability to recall positive experiences with your loved one

• Lack of trust in others

• Social isolation

• Feeling life isn’t worth living without your loved one

• Unrelenting depression, self-blame, guilt

• Panic attacks

• Uncontrollable crying

• Survivor guilt

• Sleeping problems

• Lack of appetite

• Others expressing concern for you

• Lack of self-care

A therapist can help you accept your loss, express your pain, and adjust to a new future without your loved one. I'm sorry for your loss. Your loved one would want to see you move on and care for yourself without them. Love yourself enough to seek help from a qualified mental health professional, if needed.

Question: My brother passed away yesterday morning in a car accident, and I feel that if I listen to sad songs, the grief will go away. Should I listen to fun songs or sad songs?

Answer: With such a recent loss, it probably isn't helpful to listen to a playlist of upbeat, perky, fun songs. Additionally, if grieving family members overhear your music choice, they may be confused and offended by your choice. You're grieving and those songs probably do not reflect your true emotions right now. You need time to process how you're feeling instead of burying it. It's possible you may still be in denial.

Some of the sorrow and grief songs may help you connect with the feelings of missing your brother. I hope that you can connect with your family during this time and begin to process his loss. I am sorry about this personal tragedy in your life.

Question: I just lost my mother four days ago and I don't know how I'm feeling at all. How does this end?

Answer: I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother. You must feel upside down right now with grief. It's natural to feel shock and a feeling of "is this really happening?" Please lean on your support system, particularly adult mentors who can provide support and stable guidance. These might be older relatives, neighbors, or even someone in your church. Additionally, there may be friends, coworkers, and acquaintances who have lost parents so communicate your loss so they can assist you in emotional and practical ways, as appropriate. Don't be afraid to ask for support. You'd be surprised how helpful people can be. Losing a parent can be jarring for someone of any age, so be patient with yourself. Talk about your mom with others to keep your memory alive. Seek counseling if you are having trouble. This ends with you continuing on with your life. Your mom would want you to flourish.

Question: Four of my friends died in a car accident recently. I was in love with one of my friends. It’s been over a month and still haven’t gotten past it. How do I cope with this regret?

Answer: I'm sorry about your loss. You shouldn't expect to be over this personal tragedy in just one month. People grieve at different rates, but that would be tremendously fast. In high school which was around 35 years ago for me, I lost a friend I adored to suicide and can attest that there are some things you never 100% get over. Your sadness and regret -- I imagine at not telling your friend how deeply you felt -- further complicates your grief. If you can see a counselor (e.g.,psychologist, licensed clinical social worker) it may help you through this period.

Alternatively, you could also talk with an adult in your life who is a good listener and has years of perspective. You may be surprised what some of the adults in your life have been through in their youth. If appropriate, you could also arrange a visit to your friend's family (their mother in particular). Bring flowers or some token to brighten their day, and let the family know how much your friend meant to you, including your regret. Telling them may provide you some consolation. You might even maintain a relationship with the family.

This loss will be difficult to process, but you will get through it. Please lean on those who care about you, and get professional help if you need it. Specifically, if you find that your grief is still heavy after 6-12 months, you may be experiencing complicated grief and suffering from depression, a treatable condition. In that case, you'll need to see a psychologist for help.

Question: My boyfriend died yesterday and I don’t know how to handle it. I feel empty and guilty in a way. Is there any way I can overcome that pain faster?

Answer: Your grief is so raw and recent that you probably just want the pain to go away simply. I'm sorry about your loss. It's not uncommon to feel survivor's guilt and shock, like the emptiness you describe. Unfortunately, however, it's best that you not rush through the grieving process by trying to get through the pain faster. Instead, rely on others who loved your boyfriend and who care about you -- his relatives and yours as well as mutual friends. Grieve together, relive memories, and support one another through this sad emotional time. Perhaps find a private way to honour his memory. This will be a process. Again, I'm sorry for your loss.

Question: My grandad passed recently. And I’ve also been diagnosed with many mental health issues: anxiety, depression, ADHD, autism, and OCD. How do I cope with my new diagnoses and the passing of my grandfather? I will soon start college exams, and I have enough stress already. I miss him so much, and I don’t know what to do.

Answer: With so much going on -- a recent death in your family, career exams, and existing mental health issues -- it's vital that you talk to a professional counselor about your level of stress. Make this a priority NOW. It's important that you grieve your grandfather's death but also develop both a short and long-term plan for adapting the best you can to your health issues, including learning positive and productive ways of coping. A professional therapist can help you through this process. In the aftermath of your grandfather's death, also try to stay active and engaged, talking for example with family and others who knew him regarding your feelings and memories. Relatives who miss him too and are hurting like you are can be a source of mutual support. I am sorry for your loss.

Question: In the last two weeks, I have suffered multiple losses: my girlfriend, my brother and two of my best friends to suicide, and my grandma to murder. My mom has told me to get a grip on life, that my friends and family were all terrible people. When she told me these things I went and tried to kill myself and started to cut my arms and legs. I feel like nobody wants me. I have a new girlfriend now and she is in the same boat as me. What should I do?

Answer: You have suffered multiple losses and need a source of empathy and stability in your life. Please don’t try to get through these tragedies alone. Seek the help of a professional mental health counselor NOW. With your past suicide attempt, status as a survivor of multiple suicide losses, and your loss by homicide, you are at increased risk for suicide yourself. I am concerned, too, that your support system isn’t strong. Don’t delay in getting yourself to a counselor.

I am sorry for the losses you have experienced. Grieving a death by homicide involves intense feelings of anxiety, helplessness, trouble concentrating and sleeping, and other significant symptoms of post-traumatic stress as you deal with the justice system and perhaps the media on top of your loss. (Issues that further complicate grief include when a family member was the person who committed the crime and when there is no conviction. I hope this isn't your case as well.)

Grieving a death by suicide can be a much more intense and lengthier process than many other losses, and survivors can face depression as well as post-traumatic stress. Survivors like you are also at higher risk for struggling with suicide themselves. You must protect yourself immediately and ensure that you don’t repeat the tragedy of suicide.

In addition to counseling, I recommend that you read the following FREE resource packet written by Survivors of Suicide Loss, a charitable organization: https://www.soslsd.org/resources/. They have one written specifically for teens, plus other versions for adults and children. Another good resource is this FREE Handbook for Survivors from the American Association of Suicidology: https://www.suicidology.org/Portals/14/docs/Surviv... It can help you understand more about the devastating suicide-related losses you have experienced. Please be sure to access this resource as well: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevent... It describes action steps to take if you are feeling suicidal. You cannot bring back your loved ones, but you can take care of yourself and equip yourself with information to potentially help others in your orbit.

If you are in crisis and feel like you may harm yourself, call 911 for immediate life-saving assistance. You may also contact one of the following resources for talk or text support:

1) National Hopeline Network 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433)

If you or someone you know are depressed and considering suicide, call the National Hopeline Network at 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433). Your call is free and confidential. Or chat live with a crisis volunteer at http://hopeline.com/.

2) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.TALK (8255)

Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to talk with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Note that the National Suicide Prevention website lists additional resources for Spanish speakers, people with hearing impairments, veterans in crisis, LGBTQ+, youth, Native Americans, loss survivors and people facing distress related to natural disasters. I’m providing the link to their survivors of suicide loss resource page: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/help-yoursel...

3) Crisis Text Line Number 741741

If you're in crisis and prefer to text rather than call, then here's a confidential crisis text line staffed nationally by trained counselors in suicide prevention. Text "HOME" to 741741 from anywhere in the United States.

Take action for yourself today by contacting a mental health counselor or psychologist in your community and keeping the names of these crisis centers in your wallet in case you need then in an urgent situation. Remove weapons and other lethal means from your home now while you're thinking about it.

You are worth saving. We need you on this planet, alive and well. Stay with us, friend.

Question: My ex-boyfriend passed away from suicide. Something happened to him in his childhood that he carried around him his whole life. He tried to fix it with drugs and other bad habits. I did my best to be there for him, but now I'm the one depressed. He meant so much to me. What can I do to move on?

Answer: You are a survivor of suicide loss, and I am so sorry that you have joined this “club” no one wants to belong to. When someone dies by suicide, they typically leave 135 family members, co-workers, friends, acquaintances, and others who knew them to deal emotionally with the devastating loss. In addition to sadness, you may find yourself feeling anger, guilt, regret, blaming, many unresolved questions, and other confusing emotions.

Grieving a death by suicide can be much more intense and lengthier than other losses, and survivors can face depression as well as post-traumatic stress. Survivors like you are also at higher risk for considering suicide themselves. You must care and protect yourself immediately and ensure that you don’t repeat this tragedy.

Do not leave this untreated. Seek the support of a professional mental health counselor or psychologist.

In addition to counseling, I recommend that you read the following FREE resource packet written by Survivors of Suicide Loss, a charitable organization: https://www.soslsd.org/resources/. They have one written specifically for teens, plus other versions for adults and children. Another good resource is this FREE Handbook for Survivors from the American Association of Suicidology: https://www.suicidology.org/Portals/14/docs/Surviv... It can help you understand more about the devastating loss you have experienced. Please be sure to access this resource as well: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/suicide-prevent... It describes action steps to take if you are feeling suicidal. You cannot bring back your ex-boyfriend, but you can take care of yourself and equip yourself with information to potentially help others in your orbit.

If you are in crisis and feel like you may harm yourself, call 911 for immediate life-saving assistance. You may also contact one of the following resources for talk or text support:

1) National Hopeline Network 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433)

If you or someone you know are depressed and considering suicide, call the National Hopeline Network at 1.800.SUICIDE (1.800.784.2433). Your call is free and confidential. Or chat live with a crisis volunteer at http://hopeline.com/.

2) National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.TALK (8255)

Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to talk with a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area. Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Note that the National Suicide Prevention website lists additional resources for Spanish speakers, people with hearing impairments, veterans in crisis, LGBTQ+, youth, Native Americans, loss survivors and people facing distress related to natural disasters. I’m providing the link to their survivors of suicide loss resource page: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/help-yoursel...

3) Crisis Text Line Number 741741

If you're in crisis and prefer to text rather than call, then here's a confidential crisis text line staffed nationally by trained counselors in suicide prevention. Text "HOME" to 741741 from anywhere in the United States.

Again, I’m sorry for your loss. As a survivor of suicide loss myself, I can tell you the pain does get better, although it never totally goes away. Please seek the help you need now so that you can start the process of healing. I wish you well.

Question: My dog that I've had since I was 5 died one week ago, and people tell me to get over it. How do I tell them how I'm feeling without them ignoring me?

Answer: I truly understand your grief. My cat Simon died nine months ago and I still grieve his loss. He was my best buddy, and I loved him as much as I love any person. To me, people either respect animals as sentient beings capable of forming loving attachments with us and making lifelong impacts on our lives OR they do not. It's hard to make someone understand when they do not. They wouldn't tell you to snap out of your grief over a dead brother, would they? This is no different. It feels the same. I hope there is a friend or relative who can listen to your feelings.

Based on my experience, only time will ease the pain. At first, I relived a lot of my cat's last days, the death itself, and the pain he suffered at the end (he was attacked by a neighbor's dog and was in intensive care for two days before I had him euthanized). As time progressed, I was able to think more about our good times, what I loved about him, the funny and happy times, and all the ways he made my life whole. What helped me was building a memorial garden with flowers where I could reflect, plus keeping happy photos on my phone. At first they were gut-wrenching but now they remind me of my boy. There will never be another, but eventually I will love another orange cat because there are so many homeless animals needing good homes. You will eventually love again, too, when you are ready. I am sorry for your loss.

Question: I lost my mother 11 years ago today, and I still miss her like it was yesterday. I can barely speak her name still. I'm on medication and have gone to grief counseling. My faith in God is keeping me alive, but I just don't care anymore. Any help as to what to do next?

Answer: First, I’m sorry for your loss. Oftentimes, anniversaries of loved ones’ deaths are difficult, no matter how many years have transpired. Although there are some losses that people never fully recover from, you owe it to yourself and your mother’s memory to cope with this personal setback and make a plan for yourself to move on positively. Your mother would NOT want to see you like this after 11 years.

Find a good psychotherapist (talk therapist) and develop an action plan together that

1) broadens your social support system

2) gets you exercising so you have endorphins, the body’s own “feel good” drugs, working for you

3) finds you a purpose to wake up in the morning

4) gives you accountability for yourself and

5) allows you to keep your mother’s memory alive in a positive way.

There’s only so much that medication can do. There is a growth opportunity here. I know you miss your dear mother, but you can do this, sweet lady.

Question: My grandmother passed away a few months ago. My mom and grandfather seem to have recovered well, but I have not. When she died, I fell into a depressive episode and stayed stuck there until a few days after my birthday a month after. I thought I had moved on and recovered, however now I find myself angry with both the world and myself again. I’m stuck in a cycle of anger and depression. Is anger a healthy response to my mother and grandfather's behavior?

Answer: There are three significant points here. First, it's only been a few months since your grandmother has died, and you have not fully processed her death. Be easy on yourself. A flood of emotions is normal. It would be helpful to talk about your loss and your memories of your grandmother with loved ones, caring friends, or a counselor.

Second, people grieve differently and take different amounts of time to process the death of a loved one. Your mother and grandfather likely have had more experience in dealing with loss in their lives. This may be the first significant death experience for you, however. Your mother and grandfather may have been bracing themselves for her loss mentally, emotionally, and practically so that when it actually came it was less surprising. The support they are receiving as a daughter and widower may be more substantial. Alternatively, they may be withholding how they are really coping for fear of upsetting you. Try to open up about how you're still having trouble dealing with it. Ask for their love, time, and patience. You may be surprised.

Third, because you each had different relationships with your grandmother, her passing had different meaning for each of you. Consider in particular what you are specifically angry about. Lost opportunities, for example? Is there something you can do to help bridge the gap?

I'm sorry for your loss and hope that you can use this loss to reconnect with your family and remember your grandmother's memory. Don't hesitate to seek the assistance of a mental health professional if you feel you aren't processing the grief well in about a year.

Question: My mom died due to a drug overdose. I'm a teen and it's been almost a year now. Sometimes when I just want to cry over losing her, I can't. Is this healthy, or is this telling me that I need to get over it?

Answer: I'm so sorry for your loss. Everyone grieves differently so please don't feel compelled to behave in one way or another. Sometimes the emotions are there but the tears don't come. That's okay. Don't place additional demands on yourself.

Losing one's mother is a life-changing event no matter what your age is. However, being at an age when you still depend on her makes the loss more difficult. Place your priority upon finding someone to talk to about your feelings of loss and the aftermath of her death. It would be helpful for you to see a qualified mental health counselor, if possible, because of the way your mother died, the difficulty you've been having, and your youth. Also, talk to understanding relatives about her memory. She may be gone physically but she'll always be with you.

© 2017 FlourishAnyway

Comments

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 05, 2020:

Ava Bruno - Thanks for the suggestions. I added "I Miss You."

Ava Bruno on September 04, 2020:

I Miss You by Miley Cyrus or I’ll Always Remember You by Hannah Montana

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 30, 2020:

Ryan M Swift - Thank you for the song suggestion.

Ryan M Swift on August 30, 2020:

Hi. Lovely article. ‘Gods’ by In Isolation is a moving track about the passing of a father.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 23, 2020:

Cris - That's a good one. Thanks for the recommendation.

Cris on August 23, 2020:

Dad's Old Number by Cole Swindell

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 09, 2020:

Millie - Thank you for recommending this song. I am adding it. Be safe in this difficult time.

Millie on August 07, 2020:

amazing collection wow. just like to recommend a more recent song that really hit hard - two of us by Louis Tomlinson - released earlier this year after the passing of his mother.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on July 24, 2020:

Linda Hawkins - I'm sorry for the loss of your dear daughter.

Linda Hawkins on July 24, 2020:

It was song called Breathe by Lee Hi It was dedication of my daughter when she died because of Coronavirus outbreak at 51 year old even my grandchildren missed her

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on July 13, 2020:

Charles Lin - I'm sorry about your loss. I hope your principal had a happy life and knew that he was appreciated, valued, and loved by many in his community as well as his family.

Charles Lin on July 13, 2020:

I was played Shinee Our Page last week I know it was dedicate to my principal of my highschool who was passed away around June 18 2019 at the age of 87 because this song is good

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 10, 2020:

Shyron, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your dear husband. I wish you health and healing and offer you a big hug from across the internet, sweet lady. I've added the suggested song to the playlist Songs About Waiting for Someone You Love.

Shyron E Shenko from Texas on June 09, 2020:

Flourish, thank you so much for these healing hubs, I know a lot of people who listen to songs for the soothing effects, I know I do. I am still trying to get through this funk, I have been in after losing my Hubby.

I did not see Hello Darlin by Conway Twitty, I do think you would like it.

Blessings my friend.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 07, 2020:

Lou Davis - Thank you for this suggestion which I have added. I am sorry for your loss.

Lou Davis on June 06, 2020:

The End by Linkin Park This song is about deticate to older my brother who was passed away in 2018 when he was 72 years old because my nephew likes this song and same with my kids and my grandchildren too

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 27, 2020:

AC - Thanks for the song recommendation which I added.

AC on May 22, 2020:

How to save a life by The Fray

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on April 20, 2020:

Peggy - Thank you. I do get some heartbreaking Q&As on various topics and try to provide thoughtful responses.

Peggy Woods from Houston, Texas on April 19, 2020:

In that Q & A, you are offering some excellent advice for those still suffering from the grief of lost loved ones. I also liked many of your suggestions for ways to honor loved ones. Songs can often tug at our heartstrings, particularly if they are associated with our loved ones. Obviously, many songs have addressed this subject.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on April 04, 2020:

Diana - I'm so sorry about your dad's passing. Please remember the good times and how much I am sure he loved you.

Diana on April 04, 2020:

After my father was passed away from from colon cancer I am just remember about my dad's life especially I am going to listen Day By Day by Bigbang Goodbye by 2NE1 Super Junior Its You and BTS One Spring Day

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on March 18, 2020:

Justin - I'm sorry about your loss.

Justin on March 17, 2020:

I knew about my college classmate's death from the accident what i learn about letting go and have fun especially i am focus in playing Fortine to dealing the death

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 10, 2020:

Bob - You honor their memories through your positive spirit and by keeping them in your heart. I'm sorry for your losses. Thank you for sharing.

tom from Yuma, AZ on February 09, 2020:

I have had several loved ones pass but the 2 that hurts the most re my brother Bob 54 Ion feb. 6, 2017 Going to honer him June 19, 2020 by going to see the last band in concert we went to Brit Floyd and taking some of his ashes with me when the play wish you were here going to spread them around my seat ( yes my brother would approve. and more recently was my mother Dec. 20, 2019. I am going to honer her in a few ways one is to continue walking annually for the alzheimer's foundation, placing some of her ashes in a horse necklace and wear it always, and last and most importantly continue my recovery after a 40 year drug addiction

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 03, 2020:

Liz - I am so sorry for both your loss and your health issues. Take your time in grieving your mother's dealth and be easy on yourself. (Your mother's kitty is grieving her death as well.) Reach out to others for help, whether your brother, other relatives, friends, neighbors, etc. Try to stay busy, even if it's volunteer work. Get dressed and leave your house every day so that you have human contact with others. If you can afford it, get a massage on occasion because it will soothe and relax your muscles and with your mom gone you're missing the important power of touch. Also, seek out counseling as this will help you process all that has happened and will help you make a positive plan for your future. While this seems like a very lonely, sad time right now, and no one can ever replace your mother, perhaps there are some steps you can take for yourself that will help you get to a peaceful, content place in life. I am wishing you all the best.

Liz on February 01, 2020:

My mom died about 5 months ago while i was in the hospital. I had a tracheotomy and was on a ventilator for 3 weeks. Some of my family thought my mom should not see me like that cause she was in the hospital too. Sometimes i blame myself for her down turn into death becuase i wanted to see her before surgery just in case something went wrong. While i was recovering from that surgery with a trach she past a way and i didn't get to see her or touch her before she died. I did get a chance for her to hear my voice though from the nurses phone at the hospice she was at and then a few hours later she died. I could not groeve at the time due to health issues and having to deal with stuff after someone dies. I was still healing at the time and was waiting for a nother surgery cause they found cancer in my thyroid during the first. I had to have my thyroid removed. It took another 2 months before i got home to a lonely house cause i had lived with my mom to help each other out since i dropped out of college when my grandma died. I have sense been going through her stuff and cleaning house while trying to heal. Im also taking care of her cat who just had to have emergency surgery. I don't let others know just how much im hurting and i cry almost all day on the weekends. I feel so alone most days though my brother checks on me most days. It is so hard some days, it had been mostly just me and my mom for so long. I miss her so much and it feels like i cant fully grieve cuase it makes my health issues meaning my trach worse. I know she is in a better place free of pain and hurt she suffered through most of her life but it is painful with out her.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 27, 2020:

Patrick - Such a poignant song! Thanks for suggesting it!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 27, 2020:

Justin24 - I miss him too.

Patrick on January 26, 2020:

One song that is the most beautiful I have ever heard is To Build A Home by Cinematic Orchestra

Justin24 on January 26, 2020:

Its good about playing music I knew i missed Kobe Bryant because his dead from the plane crash with is daughter No matter what it is ok to deal with the death people especially playing with sports for good idea

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 22, 2020:

JamieDoe - I am so sorry for your loss. I understand the loss of suicide but can't fathom what it would be like to lose a child to suicide. I 100% agree with your sentiments. I encourage anyone who is hurting to reach out for help without delay to a resource listed, 911, or a mental health resource in their own community.

JamieDoe on January 21, 2020:

My son just died by suicide. I want to tell anyone contemplating suicide that you might think everyone is better off without you, or so desperately sad that you don’t even stop to think about what it will do to the ones you leave behind. It will rip a bloody hole in their heart that will always bleed and will never heal. You are more loved than you even know. Your life is so much more valuable than you can even imagine. I tell you that no matter how horrible your life is or how sad you feel “This too will pass”..... it will pass. It’s a season of your life but one season moves into the next... they always do. You will be so grateful that you called someone to help you or you went for help. I don’t know you but I care that you keep breathing whoever needed to hear this. I’d give anything if someone had told my son that and I could hold him now.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on December 18, 2019:

Anna - Thank you for these song suggestions. I have added some of them here and others on the playlist Songs About Breakups, Heartbreak, and Divorce or Songs About Missing Someone You Love.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on December 18, 2019:

Livthebest - What a heartrending choice. A big hug to you from across the internet. I'm sure she looks over you and wishes she could be with her family. I'm sorry for your loss.

Livthebest on December 18, 2019:

The thing I remember most about my mom was that she had chose to not do chemo to save my baby brother. The options were 1. Do chemo and have the baby die but you have a better chance of living. Or 2. Don’t do chemo save the baby and you have more ove a risk of dieing. She chose 2. I was about to turn 9 and my baby brother was 3 months old when she died.

Anna on December 14, 2019:

I listed some more suggestions here, I hope they're helpful.

Kodaline - All I Want

Shannon Lay - Coast

Lou Doillon - ICU

Death Cab For Cutie - Transatlanticism

Death Cab For Cutie - Title And Registration

Tom Rosenthal - Go Solo

Tom Rosenthal - It's Ok

Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here

Alex Hepburn - Broken Record

Coldplay - The Scientist

Kaleb Jones - Till The World Stops Turning

Rihanna - Close To You

Birdy - I'll Never Forget You

Tom Odell - Heal

Lana Del Rey - Coachella

Oasis - Talk Tonight

Snow Patrol - New York

Ian Fisher, Present - Regret

Simon & Garfunkel - The Sound If Silence

Bon Iver - Holocene

Bleachers - Like A River Runs

Led Zeppelin - Stairway To Heaven

Tame Impala - Solitude Is Bliss

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on December 06, 2019:

T J Mays - Thanks for stopping by.

T J Mays on December 06, 2019:

Great song list for palliative care families.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on November 03, 2019:

Trisha - Thanks for these song suggestions.

Trisha on November 01, 2019:

I am still like Lee Hi's Breath and Shinee's Our Page because we remember about the death of Shinee's Jonghyun and of course Remember Me from Coco

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 19, 2019:

Garry - Thank you for the song suggestion.

Garry on September 18, 2019:

Niagara by Inspiral Carpets should be on the list. It's hauntingly good.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 25, 2019:

Jimmy - Thank you for the suggestion. This song is on the playlist of songs about missing someone you love.

jimmy on August 24, 2019:

when you're gone-avril lavinge (2007)

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 11, 2019:

Marco Esposito - Thank you for the song recommendation. I added it at #169.

Marco Esposito on August 10, 2019:

I find "If today was your last day" by Nickelback really gets me in tears.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 03, 2019:

Stephanie - I'm glad this is helpful.

Stephanie on August 03, 2019:

Thank you for this. It’s much appreciated.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 27, 2019:

Shawindi - I appreciate your kind comment.

Shawindi Silva from Sri lanka on June 26, 2019:

Lovely collection !!

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 26, 2019:

Bruce - Thanks for the suggestion of that sad song. I also listed it on two other Spinditty playlists, songs about soldiers and veterans and songs about redheads. I appreciate your commenting.

Bruce on June 24, 2019:

My saddest song of all time, My Son by Gary Puckett

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 19, 2019:

big nic - I added it. Did you know that it's been referred to as one of the worst songs of all time and a song that just won't die? I don't necessarily agree, just thought it was mildly funny and a bit intense.

big nic studd on June 19, 2019:

C'mon, you overlooked the absolute best, a classic!

Terry Jacks, Seasons in the Sun

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on June 06, 2019:

Vince Boychuk - The story behind that is a true heartbreaker. Thanks for the song recommendation. I added it.

Vince Boychuk on June 05, 2019:

Chris Cornell - I Promise It's Not Goodbye

Robert Sacchi on May 24, 2019:

Yes, the original version is not necessarily the best or the most popular.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 24, 2019:

Bob - Thank you. Sometimes I include updated cover versions, especially if they involve a popular band.

Robert Sacchi on May 23, 2019:

The original "Last Kiss" was by J Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on May 22, 2019:

Rosaline - Thank you for sharing what you remember most about your lost loved one.

Rosaline on May 22, 2019:

Their unconditional love inspite of not knowing i can't defend them from their pain because i planned to see them again. The spark in their eyes along with thier smile well spoken people who wasn't afraid to make a change. The encouraging words they spoke the truth putting God first dont stress you can handle it. Helping someone like me, wasn't an easy task. They gave me a reason to appreciate life; live for love we'll see you again.

Robert Sacchi on April 22, 2019:

You too have a great week.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on April 22, 2019:

Bob - Thank you for these suggestions. I added two to this list and another to the playlist on dreams and dreaming. Have a great week!

Robert Sacchi on April 21, 2019:

Another great list. Hopefully many can find some comfort in the songs on this list.

There is:

"Rocky" by Austin Roberts

"Emma" by Hot Chocolate

"Leader of the Pack" by The Shangra-las - This one tells a story

"Run Joey Run" by David Geddes - Another ballad

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on April 07, 2019:

Dear Hope - I'm very sorry for your loss. I don't know how long ago this was or what type of psychological counseling you received afterward, but I strongly recommend that you seek counseling. Homicide invokes a special type of grief that never truly goes away, and to have witnessed your father's death at such a young age, one must suspect that you are experiencing PTSD. With assistance, you can learn healthy skills for caring for yourself emotionally in the aftermath of this trauma. Please enlist the services of a licensed professional therapist (e.g., clinical psychologist) who can help you. Ask your family doctor for the name of a good one.

You may also find the following information helpful. The National Center for Victims of Crime website http://victimsofcrime.org/ includes helpful resources on coping, grief, and self-care; relevant resources in your community; a GetHelp bulletin; crime statistics; legal and advocacy information and more.

The site also lists information for VictimConnect, a free national helpline that is dedicated to serving all victims. VictimConnect can be reached at 855-4-VICTIM (855-484-2846) from 8:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m. EST. The online chat https://chat.victimconnect.org/online/ is available 9:30 a.m.-6:30 p.m. EST.

Again, I'm sorry this happened to you and your family, Hope.

hope somone sees this on April 07, 2019:

my dad was murdered in front of me when i was 5 and i cant seem to forget about it

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on March 17, 2019:

Christina - That is so much for one person to bear within a compressed period of time. Hugs to you. I hope you have a strong support system. I am sorry for your losses and hope that you continue to work through them in a positive way for yourself and your child. Thank you for sharing your story so that others can know they are not alone.

I have added many of your suggestions to the current playlist or one of the following Spinditty playlists:

1) songs about trying to get over an ex

2) songs about missing someone you love

3) songs about breakups, heartbreak and divorce

4) songs about saying goodbye.

Wishing you all the best. - FlourishAnyway

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on March 17, 2019:

Anthony Diaz - I'm sorry about the loss of your aunt. It's beautiful that you had her in your life while you did. I'm sure she would be with you if she could. Thank you for sharing these song suggestions, as they will help others who are going through a difficult time. Wishing you all the best. - FlourishAnyway

Christina on March 16, 2019:

I buried the love of my life/my son's father (kiddo was just barely 4), both of my parents, and my 27y/o cousin all within 6 months of each other in 2016. So boy I know grief. Some good songs I listen to and sometimes help me:. "What hurts the most" by Rascal Flatts; "impossible" by Shontelle; "Travelin Soldier" by Dixie Chicks; "I miss you a little" by John Michael Montgomery, "Love takes time" by Mariah Carey; "Hello" by Adele; "Goodbye my friend" by Linda Rondstat; "Objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are" by Meatloaf; "Whiskey lullaby" by Allison Krause and Brad Paisley; Just a dream" by Carrie Underwood; "I remember L.A." by Celine Dion; "The truth" by Jason Aldean. That's some of them.

Anthony Diaz on March 14, 2019:

Panama - Quinn XCII

This song helped so much with the loss of my aunt.

Cold - jeff williams

Home - jeff williams

Home isn't really about loss but it with out a doubt helped me a lot. Cold helped me realize what i was feeling so i could cope with my loss. I hope these songs can help someone the way they helped me.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on February 12, 2019:

Jeff Simard - I'm so sorry for your loss. She was by your side so many years, and you're obviously still deeply grieving her absence in a way that is making it difficult for you to function. Because of this, it would be helpful if you could connect with a mental health counselor or psychologist for individual counseling. It's possible they could also set you up with a support group for widows/widowers. If you have kids, keep their mental health in mind as well. (Your level of grief may have impacted your ability to be there emotionally or practically for them, and they may need professional help processing their mother's loss.)

Also make sure you actively reach out to family, friends, and others who are willing to help you and listen. Ask for assistance if it's not offered. This is not the time to go it alone.

Treat yourself kindly. Take the steps you need to care for yourself so that you can heal.

Jeff Simard on February 12, 2019:

Sometimes I get so lost in my mind can't concentrate on my work, trying to start over and dont know where to start, i lost my wife October 29 2 months before our 22 anniversary i miss her so much......

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 26, 2019:

Jaomara - That's a really poignant song. I really appreciate your suggestion and have added it above. Have a good weekend.

Jaomara on January 25, 2019:

If I Have To Go - Tom Waits

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on January 10, 2019:

Suhail - Glad you found this playlist of benefit. Hope you are doing well.

Suhail Zubaid aka Clark Kent from Mississauga, ON on January 07, 2019:

Very comprehensive list, Flourish! I will be tuning them into several of them again.

My personal best is 'Everybody hurts' by R.E.M. though. It came with a strong video too back in 1993 (give or take one year). I always had tears in my eyes watching the video. I think the band has retired, but it still gets airtime every now and then on GTA FMs.

Regards,

Suhail

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on December 26, 2018:

Rob - Thank you for your suggestions. I added "It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday" to this playlist. "One Sweet Day" was already on here at #62. Also, "A Song for Mama" is on the Spinditty playlist, "Songs About Families. Thanks again for your comment! Have a great week.

Rob on December 25, 2018:

What about the Boyz 2 Men songs “It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday”, “A Song For Momma”,and “One Sweet Day” w/ Mariah Carey?

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on December 06, 2018:

Brian - This is a really powerful song. I'm adding to both this playlist and the playlist, "Songs About Aging and Growing Older." Merry Christmas!

Brian on December 05, 2018:

I think Fade In/Fade Out by Nothing More is a really powerful song that helps people deal with the passing of parents.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 16, 2018:

Poppy - I'm so sorry for your loss and all the hopes and dreams that it represented in your lives together. I wish you love and healing.

Poppy from Enoshima, Japan on October 15, 2018:

Thanks for these. Sometimes songs can express feelings that normal thoughts can’t. I recently had a miscarriage and it’s oddly comforting to have a song articulate your feelings.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 15, 2018:

Emma - Thank you for that song suggestion. I am adding it at #149.

Emma on October 15, 2018:

In my dreams, james morrison.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 01, 2018:

livingwithregret - Thank you for these song suggestions. Although they are not on the playlist, many people read the Comments Section so they will see them here.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on October 01, 2018:

livingwithregret - I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment an share a bit about yourself. Wishing you all the best, FlourishAnyway

livingwithregret on October 01, 2018:

Also thank you for adding Avenged Sevenfold's So Far Away, I was shocked too see it because not a lot of people believe the genre itself could make a song like that, I actually had So Far Away played at my sons visitation and funeral.

livingwithregret on October 01, 2018:

As a mother of an angel could I suggest a couple songs that I think would help?

If You Could See Me Fly- Annie Morgan

Tiny Angel- 360

He's My Son- Mark Schultz

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 30, 2018:

Ruth Cardullo - Thank you for sharing such loving memories of our dear father. May peace and healing be with you.

Ruth Cardullo on September 30, 2018:

my father Loring ferris meant the world to me he was warm hearted love to help anyone he could always make me laugh and smile when things were going bad I would like to make a play list of songs to help me heal my broken heart from lost of losing him my brother and I loved him so much

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 25, 2018:

Gerd Steeger - You wrote this? Impressive. I voted up on YouTube.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on September 06, 2018:

Lea Conn - I'm sorry about the loss of your mother. I'm sure she is with you in spirit.

Lea Conn on September 06, 2018:

This song makes me miss my mum, she loved this song

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 21, 2018:

Ayala Grey - Thank you so much for sharing. I have added several of the songs to this playlist and one to the playlist on home and hometowns. I'm sorry about the loss of your loved one and hope that music brings you comfort and peace.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on August 05, 2018:

Oj Smith - My condolences on the loss of your mother. May you find peace and healing in those you love, your memories, and in music. I have added your song suggestion, "Save Our Last Goodbye" as #141. "So Far Away" was already on the list at #120. All the best, FlourishAnyway

Oj Smith on August 04, 2018:

As someone who like Rock and Metal who has lost his mother suddenly and unexpectedly... may I suggest to other like minded people;

So Far Away - Avenged Sevenfold

Or

Save Our Last Goodbye - Disturbed.

FlourishAnyway (author) from USA on July 21, 2018:

Lora - I'm sorry about the loss of both your mom and sister. I'm glad that the songs were able to bring some solace. Thanks for stopping by.

Lora Hollings on July 20, 2018:

Just love the song, "Supermarket Flowers" by Ed Sheeran. Not only is the lyrical melody beautiful but the words in their simplicity make this song resonate so much with me for the loss of not only a mother but a beautiful sister. An awesome hub that can help many with their grief with the narratives that these songs tell.