46 Funny Christmas Songs
Add Some Humor to Your Holiday
If the traffic of holiday shopping is making you cranky, you can't stand the thought of another "Fa la la la la," and you're thinking of skipping the office Christmas party, then lighten it all up with some laughs. Enjoy the lighter side of Christmas with a playlist of fun songs to accentuate the humorous side of Christmas. Here is a long list of pop, rock, country and Christmas novelty songs that are guaranteed to make even the Grinch grin.
What's the funniest part about the holiday season?
1. "Merry Christmas from the Family" by Robert Earl Keene
When it comes to your family who puts the "fun" in dysfunctional? This 1994 country song is all-too-real, and if it doesn't remind you of your kinfolk, then you're just too perfect. It's filled with relatives drunk on champagne punch and craving Bloody Marys. People chainsmoke as the sister introduces her new Mexican boyfriend. (Once he sings "Feliz Navidad," the family is totally cool with him.) While someone carves the turkey and turns on the ballgame, another relative makes a run to the convenience store for a random set of necessities for the low key happy clan. Christmas could be worse, am I right?
2. "Santa in a 4 Wheel Drive" by The Lacs
Who knew Santa had a back-up ride? In this 2012 country song, it's raining hard on Christmas night, and the narrator catches a glimpse of Santa in a jacked up four-wheel drive Chevy. Santa has presents in the back and mud up the side, like he's been mod boggin'. Sleigh bells decorate the sides, red velvet trims the dash, and Santa's vanity plates read, "WISHLIST."
3. "Nice List (Blank Space Parody)" by Expectation Church
Poking fun at the Elf on the Shelf tradition, this hilarious novelty song from 2014 is a Christmas-themed parody of Taylor Swift's "Blank Space." If you're unfamiliar with Elf on the Shelf, it's a small stuffed doll that sits watchfully (judgmentally?) in the home in the weeks leading up to Christmas. The elf doll monitors children's behavior for transgressions that could end them up on Santa's naughty list. Each night, he plays pranks on the kids and reports back on the kids' behavior to Santa.
The song describes the Elf on the Shelf as a spy who is power hungry, out of control, and threatening as he blackmails the kiddies into being good: “I can make bad kids good for a weekend.” Unfortunately, the song publishers won't permit it to be played on sites other than YouTube, so jump over there and look it up when you've finished here.
Here's a sample of the shenanigans:
So you’re gonna start behaving
Or you’re gonna go down in flames
You can tell me when it’s over
If the gift was worth the pain
Got a long list of ex-owners
They’ll tell you I’m insane
‘Cause I know you’ll love your presents
But you must behave!
4. "Present Face" by Garfunkel and Oates
If you've ever received a gift that's completely wrong for you, then chances are you have displayed "present face" as a way of saving the gift giver's feelings. This novelty song from 2009 describes the experience:
Do they see how much I hate it?
I hope that they don’t know
I can’t tell if they’re onto me
Oh, please don’t let it show.
We all have at least one relative who simply sucks at gift giving. Oh, the awkwardness they cause, especially at major gift-giving holidays like Christmas! You cringe as you unwrap presents from them. Your smile is frozen as you try to hide your disappointment, and you fumble for positive things to say about the gift: "You really shouldn't have," "I don't have one of these," or "Just what I wanted." Then you sneak a peek to see if a gift receipt is attached (usually not).
In my family, the untalented gift giver is my sister. She's given my husband
- women's sunglasses
- a black belt that was two sizes too big (when he asked for a brown one), and
- a VHS tape celebrating the career of a comedian he doesn't enjoy.
At this point, he has "present face" nailed, but we've learned to ask for gift cards instead.
5. "I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus" by The Anti-Queens
Santa is really spreading his love around. In the classic 1952 holiday song, "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus," a child sneaks downstairs on Christmas Eve and spots his mother kissing the jolly old elf underneath the mistletoe. However, a lot has changed since the 1950s. Now Daddy wants a smooch from Santa, according to this 2013 rock song.
In this version, the kids sneak downstairs and hide behind the Christmas tree. Their eyes grow huge as they watch the spanking and groping: "I couldn't make I noise, who knew that he liked boys?" Oh, if only Mommy could see this!
6. "Christmas in Rehab" by Cledus T. Judd
This 2009 country song demonstrates that even rehab can be funny. The narrator is an addict who is spending his holiday season holed up with other alcoholics, crackheads, and glue sniffers who are also trying to get clean and sober. They've each made lists of issues to share with their psychiatrists. They've even have started a rehab band. The narrator confesses that although he's been here twice before, he knows he'll succeed, but if he doesn't then he'll be back next Christmas.
7. "What the Hell (It’s the Holidays)” by Joey +Rory (featuring Wynn Varble)
With it being the holidays and all, the usual rules have disappeared. The narrators in this country ditty from 2011 eye a big Christmas buffet and discard calorie counting because what the hell, it's the holidays. They say "yes" to homemade eggnog and rum for the same reason. Then they go outside to shoot the potato gun that one of the relatives brought.
When someone accidentally shoots out the window in Ma's Chevrolet, instead of getting upset, the reaction is "what the hell, it's the holidays." Then Dad writes his name in the snow (ahem ... not with his hand) and the sheriff carts him away. What the hell!?! It's the holidays! This is understated humor with a funny, surprise twist at the end.
8. "Redneck 12 Days of Christmas" by Jeff Foxworthy
In the 1990s, Jeff Foxworthy became a cultural phenomenon with his "You Might Be a Redneck If" comedy routine, and this 1995 novelty song is a natural extension of that. It features a narrator who has made a trek to Walmart for redneck Christmas gifts:
12 pack of Bud, 11 wrastlin' tickets
Tin a' Copenhagen, 9 years probation
8 table dancers, 7 packs of Redman
6 cans of spam, 5 flannel shirts
4 big mud tires, 3 shotgun shells
2 huntin' dogs and some parts to a Mustang GT.
Naturally, Foxworthy manages to slip in a few "You Might Be a Redneck" lines, although most rednecks already understand what they are and embrace the label. Here are some highlights:
- you can burp the entire chorus to "Jingle Bells"
- you think that the Nutcracker is something you did of the high dive or
- you ever misspelled anything in Christmas lights.
9. "Santa's Gonna Take It All Back" by Toby Keith
We all know that Santa is a generous gift giver, but who knew his gifting was conditional? In this catchy 1995 country song, a man warns his unappreciative lover that if she doesn't start behaving, then Santa will repossess a year's worth of gifts.
The materialistic lady received a car for her birthday and dinner and wine for Valentine's Day. Now she wants perfume, earrings, and a television set for the holidays. The problem is, she expects to be lavished with these gifts and isn't very loving in return. This guy may be on to something!
10. "California Christmastime" by Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Cast
In this humor-filled 2016 Christmas song, the cast of the cable television show "Crazy Ex-Girlfriend" describes how Californians celebrate the holiday. It's 100 degrees, Santa is a sunbaked out-of-work stuntman, and they indulge in eggnog fro-yo alongside Christmas Carol, a 50-year old chick who does henna tattoos and is still finding herself (as we all are). Have a California Christmastime!
11. "Rusty Chevrolet" by Da Yoopers
This 1987 comedy song is a regional favorite among inhabitants of the upper peninsula of Michigan (called "Yoopers"). Borrowing the tune of "Jingle Bells," the song depicts a narrator who drives his dilapidated Chevrolet to the local Walmart along icy roads and through snowdrifts. His car is hard to start, is held together by chicken wire, and needs a number of parts. Although townsfolk ridicule him for his vehicle, it somehow gets him where he needs to go.
12. "Progressive Christmas Carols" by Paint
You'll either fully embrace this 2014 novelty Christmas song and wonder what took 'em so long, or you'll merrily poke fun at it. Perhaps both. A lot depends on which way you lean. The tune pays homage to the politically left-leaning among us:
You'd better not judge, you better not hate
Better not bully or discriminate
Progressive Santa's coming to town.
The medley of reworked holiday carols gives a nod to gluten free foods, multiculturalism, evolution, choice, tax reform, and other issues. Enjoy!
13. "Nuttin' for Christmas" by Art Mooney & His Orchestra (featuring Barry Gordon)
It's amazing that during the 1955 Christmas season, five different artists hit the Billboard pop charts with this Christmas novelty song. However, this million-selling version was the highest charting, peaking at #6.
The cute, mildly humorous song features a young boy who laments that he will be forced to forgo gifts this Christmas. His parents are mad at him over his naughtiness. The mischievous child describes the misdeeds that got him in current predicament, from putting a tack on his teacher's chair to destroying his mother's plants. Unfortunately, rather than accepting responsibility, the little trouble maker seems to harbor some ill will for the snitch. Something tells me this isn't over.
14. "Hairy Christmas" by The Robertsons (featuring Luke Bryan)
Back when the A&E show Duck Dynasty was a cultural phenomenon, The Robertsons capitalized on their fame by issuing a 2013 Christmas album. Country singers such as George Strait, Alison Krauss, and Josh Turner joined in as featured artists on select songs.
In "Hairy Christmas," country artist Luke Brian chimes in as he wishes you "a hairy Christmas and a happy, happy, happy New Year." The song's reworked lyrics take the tune of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas."
15. "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" by Elmo & Patsy
People usually have strong feelings one way or the other about this fun Christmas novelty song from 1979. Which camp are you in? It describes a grandmother who got lit on holiday egg nog and was in need of her medication. Although relatives pleaded with her not to leave the holiday party, she attempted to walk home in the snow, only to become a hit and run victim. Santa's out of control reindeer remain the prime suspects because her body bears incriminating hoof and claw marks.
Grieving relatives describe how well Grandpa seems to be taking her loss. They also ponder what to do with her Christmas gifts (take them back!) and throw shade on Santa, "a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves." No one, however, feels guilty for failing to check on the old lady for hours after she left.
16. "Grandpa Got Runned Over by a John Deere" by Cletus T. Judd
What goes around comes around. The grandpa in "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" got what was coming to him in this 1996 country song. As a grieving widower, Grandpa took to Jack Daniels like flies to honey. He also began smokin' weed and acting out, as if he were enjoying a second adolescence. The old fella ran off with a bleach-blonde, mooned the church choir, and started watching porno with Cousin Belle.
Come Christmas Eve, karma got the best of him. Grandpa walked home from the Moose Lodge but was found face down in the snow with tire prints on his back and hickies on his neck. Someone on a John Deere had mown him down. The narrator misses Grandpa, but at least he was able to successfully sue the tractor company for $2 million. It's what Grandpa would have wanted.
17. "Leroy the Redneck Reindeer" by Joe Diffie
Even Rudolph has to call in sick sometimes, and thankfully, when he does, Leroy the Redneck Reindeer is there to help. This country ditty from 1995 describes Leroy, Rudolph's pickup-driving stand-in. He lives out in the sticks and wears overalls and a John Deere cap.
He may be a can or two short of a six-pack, but Ol' Leroy can two-step his way across the sky leading Santa's sleigh. However, you'll have to forgive Leroy if he lets out a Rebel Yell amidst the jingle bells or attempts to wrap Santa's toys in the Rebel flag. Leroy's soft skills are probably why he's on back-up duty.
18. "Scary F**ked-Up Christmas" by Garfunkel & Oates
Between the pressure of gift giving and the bevy of difficult relatives, the holidays can be downright overwhelming. If you can't cope in a healthy way, then this cheeky 2011 novelty song recommends turning to marijuana to take the edge off:
If you can't handle Christmas sh*t
Get your bong and take a hit
Christmas is much better when you're high.
The duo notes, however, that Christmas can be scary and messed up regardless. May we all get through the season.
19. "Another Christmas Song" by Stephen Colbert
Christmas songs get played ad infinitum for more than a month leading up to Christmas, and let's face it: there's lots of money in Christmas. Someone has to write these Christmas tunes, so in this 2008 novelty song, Stephen Colbert figures it might as well be him. Cha-ching, cha-ching!
Cobert looks forward to adding the royalties to his retirement plan and supporting his children. Based on many of the popular holiday songs, it doesn't have to make sense or be good to make money. "Santa Claus singing on naughty snow ... ."
20. "What If Eminem Did Jingle Bells?" by Bob Rivers
This 2002 Christmas novelty tune sounds so authentic that you might be fooled into thinking it was actually Eminem rapping:
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells
Jingling all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride in a drop top Chevrolet, hey!
The song features alternative lyrics to "Jingle Bells." The narrator derides Santa as an obese elf who has attempted to assault the narrator's mother, and he promises revenge on not only Santa but also Santa's entire squad. After threatening and fat shaming Santa, the narrator also complains about getting underwear and socks every year. True to Eminem's music, it's truly deplorable and guaranteed to be on the permanent naughty list.
Even More Funny Christmas Songs
Song & Year Released
What's the Song About?
21. Gary the Green Nosed Reindeer (2007)
Rudolph's green-nosed half-brother saves Christmas Day in his brother's absence
22. I Got a Cold for Christmas (1983)
The Three Stooges
While everyone else received presents, the narrator got a cold for Christmas
23. Santa Song (1993)
The narrator is a badly behaved child who explains why Santa will be skipping him this Christmas
24. White Trash Christmas (2002)
A dysfunctional Christmas with the kinfolk
25. Santa Looked a Lot Like Daddy (2006)
The narrator notices an uncanny resemblance
26. Frosty the Pervert (1997)
Frosty gets arrested for being filthy
27. Thinking About Drinking for Christmas (2015)
Relatives often make you want to drink at the holidays
28. Little Dealer Boy (2008)
Willie Nelson & Stephen Colbert
A pot dealer offers the only thing he has to the newborn king
29. Penguin, James Penguin (2006)
Ever wonder how Santa keeps tabs on all the kids on his nice and naughty list? It's his Secret Agent penguin.
30. Hot Rod Sleigh (1995)
Santa has traded in his sleigh for a souped up hot rod, winter wonderland version
31. Merry Merry Merry Frickin' Christmas (2004)
The narrator laments all the annoying things about Christmas spent with relatives
32. Bizarre Christmas Incident (2002)
Santa meets his demise after getting stuck in a chimney
33. Yingle Bells (1950)
A fictional Swede sings his buoyant version of "Jingle Bells"
34. Redneck Christmas (1997)
Celebrate all the good stuff about redneck Christmastime, from traditional possum stew to Maw's new spit cupck Christmastime
35. D**k in a Box (2006)
Justin Timberlake & Andy Samberg
The narrator presents his "man package" to his girl for Christmas, all wrapped up in a box with ribbon. Just what she needs.
36. 12 Pains of Christmas (1995)
Here are all the annoying things about Christmas: in-laws, rigging the lights, bills, etc.
37. Santa Claus Is Thumbing To Town (2003)
The toy shop is on fire, Rudolph is puking holly, and the sleigh is in the shop. Santa has left the building.
38. Gothic Christmas (2003)
Rudolph will change his name, Santa will wear black and grunt in Latin. Welcome to a Gothic Christmas.
39. Christmas Booty (2017)
Rhett & Link
Take your booty up a notch and Christmas-fy it
40. I Saw Santa in the Club Last Night (2011)
The narrator spotted Santa in the club dancing in boots and tights last night
41. Santa Song (1993)
A Jewish boy who has misbehaved all year describes why Santa won't be visiting him
42. Hanukkah Song (1996)
Adam Sandler sends out some love to Jewish people at Christmastime by pointing out the benefits of Hanukkah and all the famous Jewish people
43. Christmas in Hollis
A man finds Santa's wallet and is rewarded handsomely
44. The Christians and the Pagans (1996)
An estranged extended family of practicing Christians and secular humanists celebrate the holidays together in awkward harmony
45. I Won't Be Home for Christmas (2001)
A Scrooge-like narrator complains about whiny Christmas carolers, having to be nice to people he can't stand, and just wanting the presents
46. The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late) (1958)
Alvin and The Chipmunk
A group of cute chipmunks looks forward to Christmas
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2019 FlourishAnyway